Wedding

From Halachipedia

Making the Bride and Groom Happy

  1. It is a great mitzvah to rejoice with the bride and groom at their wedding[1]
  2. The poskim discuss different ways of being able to enhance the simcha of the chattan and kallah:
    1. Some poskim say that one should be sure to dance with the chattan or kallah.[2]
    2. Some poskim say that in order to fulfill one's obligation, he should make sure to say Mazel Tov.[3]
    3. Others argue that simply showing up at the wedding is enough because it makes the chattan and kallah happy that more people attended their wedding.[4]
    4. Others say that one fulfills his obligation by giving a gift.[5]

Chuppah

Circling the Chosson

  1. The custom is that the circle is that the kallah walks around the chosson seven times under the chuppa.[6]

Wearing a Tallit under the Chuppah

  1. Some Sephardim have the practice for the Chatan to put on a Tallit during the Kiddushin and then place it over the Chatan and Kallah during the Sheva Brachot.[7]

Position of the Chattan, Kallah, and Mesader Kiddushin

  1. Among Ashkenazim, there is a Minhag for couple's backs facing the audience, while others have them facing Mizrach or specifically to the audience.[8]
  2. While some have the practice for the Kallah to stand at the right of the Chattan, others, according to the Arizal, prefer the opposite, after the Churban, while others are not makpid at all.[9]

Related Pages

Sources

  1. ↑ Shulchan Aruch EH 65:1. see Rambam Hilchot Avel 14:1 and Sdei Chemed Chatan viKallah 13.
    Pirkei Direbbi Eliezer 12 states that Hashem Himself rejoiced with Adam and Chava at their wedding in Gan Eden. Rabbenu Yona writes in Shaare Teshuva 4:11 adds that performing this mitzvah protects one from pain
  2. ↑ Rav Shlomo Zalman Auerbach (Sefer Shalmei Simcha page 310) rules that rabbis, dignitaries, and close friends of the chattan fulfill their obligation merely by attending the wedding but others should dance until they feel that the chattan is made happy by their actions
  3. ↑ Rav Chaim Kanievsky (Yismach Lev 251)
  4. ↑ Rav Elyashiv (Yismach Lev 251)
  5. ↑ Shulchan Haezer (vol. 2 page 72)
  6. ↑ Kitzur S"A 147:5. Shulchan Haezer 7:4 writes that some have the custom to circle around three times. Yalkut Yosef Sova Semachot vol. 1 6:footnote 5
  7. ↑ Ben Ish Chai (Shoftim year 1, n. 12), Yalkut Yosef (Sova Semachot 1:6:10), Nitei Gavriel (Nesuin v. 1, 18:10)
  8. ↑ HaRav Hershel Schachter, shalita, (Kiddushin 5777 Shiur #58) quotes the Yekkish Minhag to stand with the couple's backs facing the audience as a means of avoiding being considered Mekadesh beShuk. He notes how the Poskim, however, don't take this into consideration. For example, the Kenesset HeGedolah (Hagahot Beit Yosef Even HaEzer 61:4) lists a Minhag for each of the four directions but concludes that nowadays we are not concerned. In Nefesh HaRav (pg. 257), Rav Schachter writes that Rav Soloveitchik, was makpid that they should face Mizrach. He also said in shiur that Rav Hutner started a Minhag that the Chattan should face the audience and not the rabbi, so people should realize the Chattan is performing the marriage and the Mesader Kiddushin is just a spectator, unlike how a priest officiates at a Christian wedding. However, in MiPninei HaRav (pg. 274), he depicts how, at two different weddings in the same hall, within a month of each other, Rav Soloveitchik would have the couple stand facing Mizrach, while Rav Moshe Feinstein would have them stand facing the crowd. See also Kitzur Shulchan Aruch 147:5, Aruch Hashulchan 62:9, and Nitei Gavriel Nisuin 1 17:13:24, and Yalkut Yosef (Sova Semachot 1:6:footnote 5)
  9. ↑ The Kenesset HeGedolah (Hagahot Beit Yosef Even HaEzer 61:3) quotes and prefers the position of the Maharil for the Kallah to stand at the right of the Chattan and disagrees with those who propose the opposite. Yalkut Yosef (Sova Semachot 1:6:5) quotes the various opinions and sources for each of the opinions and paskens that it's proper for the Kallah to stand at the right of the Chattan, just as Rav Ovadia always practiced.
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