Kiddushin: Difference between revisions
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==Ritual Results of Kiddushin== | ==Ritual Results of Kiddushin== | ||
# Once a woman is halachically engaged, it is an extremely serious sin to have relations with anyone else.<ref>Vayikra 20:10, Rambam (Ishut 1:3)</ref> Not only that, there are numerous safeguards some of which are | # Once a woman is halachically engaged, it is an extremely serious sin to have relations with anyone else.<ref>Vayikra 20:10, Rambam (Ishut 1:3)</ref> Not only that, there are numerous safeguards some of which are biblical and some of which are rabbinic which prevent a married woman from becoming too close with another man. These apply equally to a married and halachically engaged woman.<ref>With regards to [[Yichud]], see Avoda Zara 36b. Regarding the numerous other separations between men and women, such as touching, staring inappropriately, speaking together inappropriately, listening to her voice, or even thinking about her inappropriately, see the [[Appropriate Interaction between Men and Women]] page.</ref> | ||
==Procedure of Kiddushin== | ==Procedure of Kiddushin== | ||
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# The ring should be placed on the right index finger of the kallah. If it is placed on the left hand, the Kiddushin is certainly still valid.<ref> Maharam Mintz 109, Yalkut Yosef (Sova Semachot 1:7:17), HaNisuin Kihilchatam 7:23, Rabbi Aryeh Lebowitz [http://www.yutorah.org/lectures/lecture.cfm/777863/rabbi-aryeh-lebowitz/ten-minute-halacha-the-chuppah-part-2/ Ten Minute Halacha: The Chuppah Part 2]), [http://www.yutorah.org/lectures/lecture.cfm/821631/rabbi-eliyahu-ben-chaim/how-to-perform-a-wedding-ceremony-part-2/2-/ Rav Eliyahu Ben Haim (How to Perform a Wedding Ceremony Part 2/2)] 3:30, [http://www.dailyhalacha.com/media/Syrian_Sephardic_Wedding_Guide.pdf Rabbi Eli Mansour]. | # The ring should be placed on the right index finger of the kallah. If it is placed on the left hand, the Kiddushin is certainly still valid.<ref> Maharam Mintz 109, Yalkut Yosef (Sova Semachot 1:7:17), HaNisuin Kihilchatam 7:23, Rabbi Aryeh Lebowitz [http://www.yutorah.org/lectures/lecture.cfm/777863/rabbi-aryeh-lebowitz/ten-minute-halacha-the-chuppah-part-2/ Ten Minute Halacha: The Chuppah Part 2]), [http://www.yutorah.org/lectures/lecture.cfm/821631/rabbi-eliyahu-ben-chaim/how-to-perform-a-wedding-ceremony-part-2/2-/ Rav Eliyahu Ben Haim (How to Perform a Wedding Ceremony Part 2/2)] 3:30, [http://www.dailyhalacha.com/media/Syrian_Sephardic_Wedding_Guide.pdf Rabbi Eli Mansour]. | ||
</ref> | </ref> | ||
# If the chattan uses something forbidden from benefit on a | # If the chattan uses something forbidden from benefit on a biblical level or even a rabbinic level that has a connection to a biblical law the kiddushin is completely invalid.<ref>Rav in Pesachim 7a establishes that if someone uses chametz to effect kiddushin on Erev Pesach it is invalid. Rashi s.v. afilu understands that it is referring to the sixth hour, while Rabbenu Tam (Tosfot 6b s.v. mshesh) argues that we're discussing after chatzot. The Ramban (Milchamot Hashem 3a) and Ran (on Rif 3a) agree with the Tosfot, while the Rif and Rambam seem to agree with Rashi. Tosfot Kiddushin 58a s.v. alma is bothered why the Gemara Kiddushin implies that using something forbidden by the rabbis is a valid kiddushin while Pesachim invalidates the kiddushin. They answer that if it is a rabbinic prohibition that is connected to a biblical prohibition it is totally invalid, but if it isn't connected to a biblical prohibition then the kiddushin is valid. Tosfot Chullin 4b s.v. muter has a similar approach. Rosh Kiddushin 2:31 agrees. Shulchan Aruch E.H. 28:21 codifies this approach.</ref> However, if someone uses something that is only rabbinic and not connected to any biblical law it is a dispute if that is a valid kiddushin and therefore, she would need to redo the kiddushin or receive a get before marrying someone else.<ref>Shulchan Aruch E.H. 28:21 writes that it is certainly a valid kiddushin. Biur Hagra 28:55* argues that according to Rashi 7a s.v. afilu and Rambam Ishut 5:1 it isn't a valid kiddushin. Bet Shmuel 28:52 wonders how anyone could hold that the kiddushin is valid since it is in violation of a rabbinic prohibition. Avnei Miluyim 28:54 addresses the Bet Shmuel's question.</ref> | ||
# If the chattan uses chametz in the sixth hour of Erev Pesach or rabbinic chametz after chatzot on Erev Pesach some say it is an invalid kiddushin and some say it is a dispute and requires a get before remarrying.<ref>Shulchan Aruch E.H. 28:21 writes that it is a dispute if it is a valid kiddushin both if it is real chametz in the sixth hour or rabbinic chametz after midday. From the Bet Yosef it appears that the opinion he is considered about is the Ramban (Milchamot Hashem 3a) who says that any kiddushin with chametz during the sixth hour is partially valid to the degree that she may not get remarried without a get. Additionally, the Bet Yosef 28:21 is concerned for the opinion of the Baal Hameor who thinks that we don't follow Rav in Pesachim 7a altogether. Bet Shmuel 28:53 challenges Shulchan Aruch why he was concerned with the Baal Hameor but not concerned about his opinion regarding when it is | # If the chattan uses chametz in the sixth hour of Erev Pesach or rabbinic chametz after chatzot on Erev Pesach some say it is an invalid kiddushin and some say it is a dispute and requires a get before remarrying.<ref>Shulchan Aruch E.H. 28:21 writes that it is a dispute if it is a valid kiddushin both if it is real chametz in the sixth hour or rabbinic chametz after midday. From the Bet Yosef it appears that the opinion he is considered about is the Ramban (Milchamot Hashem 3a) who says that any kiddushin with chametz during the sixth hour is partially valid to the degree that she may not get remarried without a get. Additionally, the Bet Yosef 28:21 is concerned for the opinion of the Baal Hameor who thinks that we don't follow Rav in Pesachim 7a altogether. Bet Shmuel 28:53 challenges Shulchan Aruch why he was concerned with the Baal Hameor but not concerned about his opinion regarding when it is biblical chametz after midday. He answers that the Baal Hameor himself would invalidate such a kiddushin. See Baal Hameor on 21b. Biur Hagra 28:55* disagrees with Shulchan Aruch that he isn't concerned for the opinion of the Ramban or Baal Hameor and holds that the kiddushin is invalid. This is the opinion of Rashi, Tosfot, Rosh, and Rambam.</ref> If the chattan uses chametz after midday or on Pesach itself it is an invalid kiddushin.<ref>Pesachim 7a, Shulchan Aruch E.H. 28:21</ref> | ||
===Double Ring Ceremony=== | ===Double Ring Ceremony=== | ||
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*The Rosh (Ketubot 1:12) first brings the opinion of the Rif that one must make the Beracha before, but he then brings the latter opinion and doesn't explicitly take sides. On the other hand, In his Teshuvot (Klal 26) he explicitly sides with the Rif. The Korban Netanel (2) suggests that the Rosh must really hold like the Rif, but brought the latter opinion to indicate thar if one did forget to make the Beracha before the Kiddushin, there is what to rely on to make it afterwards. The Beit Shmuel (34:4) and Chelkat Mechokek (34:2) both assume like this, as well, though they make no reference to the Rosh. | *The Rosh (Ketubot 1:12) first brings the opinion of the Rif that one must make the Beracha before, but he then brings the latter opinion and doesn't explicitly take sides. On the other hand, In his Teshuvot (Klal 26) he explicitly sides with the Rif. The Korban Netanel (2) suggests that the Rosh must really hold like the Rif, but brought the latter opinion to indicate thar if one did forget to make the Beracha before the Kiddushin, there is what to rely on to make it afterwards. The Beit Shmuel (34:4) and Chelkat Mechokek (34:2) both assume like this, as well, though they make no reference to the Rosh. | ||
*The Beit Yosef (34:1b) assumes that the Rosh holds entirely Rif; therefore, since all three Amudei HaHoraah (pillars of halacha) agree, this is the position he writes in Shulchan Aruch (34:1). The Bach takes issue with the Beit Yosef's understanding of the Rosh, as the Rosh himself (later, in 1:17) brings the opinion of Rav Nissim Gaon that one can still make Birkat Erusin up until the Nissuin. The Chiddushei Hagahot (on that Beit Yosef, printed in the Shirat Devorah Tur) raises an important issue in Kllalei HaPesak. He refers to the Kllal brought by the Tur (CM 72) that when faced with a contradiction between the Piskei haRosh and the Teshuvot HaRosh, we follow the Pesakim, so the Shulchan Aruch should've taken this into account. However, the Beit Yosef himself doesn't agree to the rule (YD 169; 201), and it's not totally clear that the Rosh changed his mind in the Pesakim. Additionally, there is little to no practical ramification, as it would be a Machaloket Amudei Horaah of 2 vs. 1, where he would just pasken against the Rosh. See further Sh"t Rambam 101, Rambam Hilchot Berachot 5:5, Sh"t Tashbetz (2:27), Meiri (Pesachim 7b), and Hagahot Rabbi Akiva Eiger (YD 19:1). | *The Beit Yosef (34:1b) assumes that the Rosh holds entirely Rif; therefore, since all three Amudei HaHoraah (pillars of halacha) agree, this is the position he writes in Shulchan Aruch (34:1). The Bach takes issue with the Beit Yosef's understanding of the Rosh, as the Rosh himself (later, in 1:17) brings the opinion of Rav Nissim Gaon that one can still make Birkat Erusin up until the Nissuin. The Chiddushei Hagahot (on that Beit Yosef, printed in the Shirat Devorah Tur) raises an important issue in Kllalei HaPesak. He refers to the Kllal brought by the Tur (CM 72) that when faced with a contradiction between the Piskei haRosh and the Teshuvot HaRosh, we follow the Pesakim, so the Shulchan Aruch should've taken this into account. However, the Beit Yosef himself doesn't agree to the rule (YD 169; 201), and it's not totally clear that the Rosh changed his mind in the Pesakim. Additionally, there is little to no practical ramification, as it would be a Machaloket Amudei Horaah of 2 vs. 1, where he would just pasken against the Rosh. See further Sh"t Rambam 101, Rambam Hilchot Berachot 5:5, Sh"t Tashbetz (2:27), Meiri (Pesachim 7b), and Hagahot Rabbi Akiva Eiger (YD 19:1). | ||
*As referenced above, there are a number of Rishonim who were of the opinion that one may make the Birkat Erusin until the Nissuin, as the | *As referenced above, there are a number of Rishonim who were of the opinion that one may make the Birkat Erusin until the Nissuin, as the biblical permissibility of one to his wife accomplished through the Erusin has not yet ended, similar to one's ability to make Birkat HaMazon as long as the food has not been fully digested in his body. Those Rishonim include the Hagahot Maimoniot (Hil' Ishut 3, 60), Hagahot Asheri (Ketubot 1:12), Rav Nissim Gaon and Rabbeinu Yonah (quoted in the Rosh Ketubot 1:17, Tur 34), the Rivash (responsa 82), Mordechai (Ketubot 1:131), Rama (34:1). See Mishneh LeMelech (Hil' Ishut 3). As it does "look" like a Beracha Levatala, when one makes Birkat Erusin at Nissuin, some Rishonim (Sh"t HaRivash 88, R' Peretz quoted in Beit Yosef 34:3, See Darkei Moshe 34:6) suggest redoing the Maaseh Kiddushin. Others even say one should repeat the Beracha (Rabbeinu Nissim quoted in Beit Yosef 34:3, Kol Bo quoted in Darkei Moshe 34:6,7), especially if he did the original Kiddushin through a Shaliach. The former Rishonim said that would be a Beracha Levatala, and one should only say the Beracha without Shem uMalchut. The Rama (34:4) paskens like the Rivash. </ref> | ||
#The Minhag is that the Mesader Kiddushin is the one who makes the Beracha.<ref>The Rama (34:1) writes that even though when one does a Mitzvah himself and not through a Shaliach he makes the Beracha himself, in order not to embarrass one who does not know how to make a Beracha, the Minhag developed that someone else makes the Beracha. | #The Minhag is that the Mesader Kiddushin is the one who makes the Beracha.<ref>The Rama (34:1) writes that even though when one does a Mitzvah himself and not through a Shaliach he makes the Beracha himself, in order not to embarrass one who does not know how to make a Beracha, the Minhag developed that someone else makes the Beracha. | ||
*With regards to making Birkat Erusin via a Shaliach, See Tosafot Ketubot 7b and Tur 34:1 who says the Shaliach makes the Beracha. The Rambam (Hil' Ishut 3:23) says that either one may makes the Beracha. Shulchan Aruch (34:1) sounds like one makes the Beracha himself regardless, and there the Rama makes his above comment. See Magen Avraham OC 432:6, Meiri beginning of second Perek of Kiddushin, Darkei Moshe (34:7, 35:1, and 62:7).</ref> | *With regards to making Birkat Erusin via a Shaliach, See Tosafot Ketubot 7b and Tur 34:1 who says the Shaliach makes the Beracha. The Rambam (Hil' Ishut 3:23) says that either one may makes the Beracha. Shulchan Aruch (34:1) sounds like one makes the Beracha himself regardless, and there the Rama makes his above comment. See Magen Avraham OC 432:6, Meiri beginning of second Perek of Kiddushin, Darkei Moshe (34:7, 35:1, and 62:7).</ref> | ||
