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Yom Kippur: Difference between revisions
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===Asking Forgiveness=== | ===Asking Forgiveness=== | ||
# Yom Kippur doesn't grant one forgiveness for one's sins between a man and his fellow until one appeases and receives forgiveness from one's friend. Therefore, it's especially important to appease one's friend on [[Erev Yom Kippur]]. <ref>Shulchan Aruch 606:1 writes that Yom kippur doesn't atone for sins between man and his fellow until one appeases his friend. The Birkei Yosef 606:1 and Pri Megadim MZ 606 write that the special power of Yom Kippur to atone for one's sins between man and Hashem doesn't kick in for him until that person asks forgiveness from anybody who he offended | # Yom Kippur doesn't grant one forgiveness for one's sins between a man and his fellow until one appeases and receives forgiveness from one's friend. Therefore, it's especially important to appease one's friend on [[Erev Yom Kippur]]. <ref>Shulchan Aruch 606:1 writes that Yom kippur doesn't atone for sins between man and his fellow until one appeases his friend. The Birkei Yosef 606:1 and Pri Megadim MZ 606 write that the special power of Yom Kippur to atone for one's sins between man and Hashem doesn't kick in for him until that person asks forgiveness from anybody who he offended. Mishna Brurah 606:1 explains that during the entire year if one offended one's friend one must appease him and if one was unable to do so one may just wait until tomorrow, however, the day before Yom Kippur one must fix everything in order to be cleansed of all one's sins. </ref> | ||
# If a person did a sin against his will because he was forced to do so, there is no obligation to repent. <ref> Rambam Peirush Hamishnayot Yoma 8:6, Aruch Hashulchan OC 602:7 </ref> | # If a person did a sin against his will because he was forced to do so, there is no obligation to repent. <ref> Rambam Peirush Hamishnayot Yoma 8:6, Aruch Hashulchan OC 602:7 </ref> | ||
# If one has money which is disputed and can be claimed by someone else even if that other claimant doesn't know one should tell them and then settle the dispute with the local Rabbi. In monetary matters one must not rely on one's own judgement because the Yetzer Hara (evil inclination) fabricates many justifications. <Ref>Mishna Brurah 606:1, Yalkut Yosef (Moadim pg 78), Chazon Ovadyah (pg 240) </ref> | # If one has money which is disputed and can be claimed by someone else even if that other claimant doesn't know one should tell them and then settle the dispute with the local Rabbi. In monetary matters one must not rely on one's own judgement because the Yetzer Hara (evil inclination) fabricates many justifications. <Ref>Mishna Brurah 606:1, Yalkut Yosef (Moadim pg 78), Chazon Ovadyah (pg 240) </ref> | ||
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# If one suspects that the person asking forgiveness from him will just repeat the wrong that he did to him, he isn't obligated to forgive him. <ref> Mishna Brurah 606:10 </ref> | # If one suspects that the person asking forgiveness from him will just repeat the wrong that he did to him, he isn't obligated to forgive him. <ref> Mishna Brurah 606:10 </ref> | ||
# If a person spread a bad name about someone else it is permitted not to forgive that person, however, it's preferable to be humble and forgive even in such a case <ref> Rama 606:1, Mishna Brurah 606:11. Aruch ha-Shulchan 606:2 writes that if it isn't possible that some of the people who heard the slander will not hear the retraction, then one is obligated to forgive. </ref> except for a Talmid Chacham who should not forgive easily (in such a case) especially when it's done for the benefit of the offender to change from his ways. <ref>Chazon Ovadyah (pg 243) </ref> | # If a person spread a bad name about someone else it is permitted not to forgive that person, however, it's preferable to be humble and forgive even in such a case <ref> Rama 606:1, Mishna Brurah 606:11. Aruch ha-Shulchan 606:2 writes that if it isn't possible that some of the people who heard the slander will not hear the retraction, then one is obligated to forgive. </ref> except for a Talmid Chacham who should not forgive easily (in such a case) especially when it's done for the benefit of the offender to change from his ways. <ref>Chazon Ovadyah (pg 243) </ref> | ||
# If one is owed money but the borrower refuses to pay, then the lender doesn't need to forgive him. <ref> Rambam Hilchot [[Teshuvah]] 2:9 | # If one is owed money but the borrower refuses to pay, then the lender doesn't need to forgive him. <ref> Rambam Hilchot [[Teshuvah]] 2:9 </ref> | ||
# If a person said [[Lashon Hara]] about his fellow and it didn't cause any harm there is no need to ask forgiveness from that person, but still must get forgiveness from Hashem. <ref> Chofetz Chaim Hilchot [[Lashon Hara]] 4:12. </ref> | # If a person said [[Lashon Hara]] about his fellow and it didn't cause any harm there is no need to ask forgiveness from that person, but still must get forgiveness from Hashem. <ref> Chofetz Chaim Hilchot [[Lashon Hara]] 4:12. </ref> | ||
# If a person said [[Lashon Hara]] (evil speech) about his fellow that caused harm and his fellow doesn't know about it some say that one should just ask forgiveness from his fellow in a general way and not spell out that he said [[Lashon Hara]] against him, however, others say that one specify that one did speak [[Lashon Hara]] about him. <ref> Shalmei Moad (pg 56) and Moadim u'Zmanim 1:54 quote Rav Yisrael Salanter who says that if one spoke [[Lashon Hara]] about one's fellow and he doesn't know about it that one should just ask forgiveness in a general way, while the Chafetz Chaim 4:12 argues that one must specify that one spoke [[Lashon Hara]]. This is how he is quoted in the book A Lesson a Day page 28 as well. However, if specifying what the [[Lashon Hara]] was will embarrass the victim, he writes in Mishna Brurah 606:3 that the speaker doesn't need to elaborate about what he said. Yalkut Yosef 606:16 rules like Rav Yisrael Salanter </ref> | # If a person said [[Lashon Hara]] (evil speech) about his fellow that caused harm and his fellow doesn't know about it some say that one should just ask forgiveness from his fellow in a general way and not spell out that he said [[Lashon Hara]] against him, however, others say that one specify that one did speak [[Lashon Hara]] about him. <ref> Shalmei Moad (pg 56) and Moadim u'Zmanim 1:54 quote Rav Yisrael Salanter who says that if one spoke [[Lashon Hara]] about one's fellow and he doesn't know about it that one should just ask forgiveness in a general way, while the Chafetz Chaim 4:12 argues that one must specify that one spoke [[Lashon Hara]]. This is how he is quoted in the book A Lesson a Day page 28 as well. However, if specifying what the [[Lashon Hara]] was will embarrass the victim, he writes in Mishna Brurah 606:3 that the speaker doesn't need to elaborate about what he said. Yalkut Yosef 606:16 rules like Rav Yisrael Salanter </ref> | ||
