Three Weeks: Difference between revisions

# It is permitted to become engaged or write tenaim during the Nine Days, and even on Tisha B’Av itself as long as there is no meal to celebrate or music and dancing.  <ref> S"A 551:2 with Magen Avraham 551:10, and Mishna Berura 551:16 and 19, Tur 551 in the name of Rav Nissim, Kitzur Shulchan Aruch 122:1, Pri Megadim Eshel Avraham 551:10, Baer Heitev 551:11, Moed Likol Chai 9:18, Ben Ish Chai Parashat Devarim 1:5, Chayei Adam 133:8, Aruch Hashulchan 551:8 </ref> Until Rosh Chodesh, one is allowed to celebrate the engagement with a festive meal. <ref> Mishna Berura 551:19 </ref>  

==Cutting Hair==

# For Sephardim it’s permitted to take a hair cut during the three weeks even a Sephardic Yeshiva Bachur in a Ashkenazi Yeshiva <Ref>Sh”t Yechave Daat 4:36, 3:39, Sh”t Yabea Omer 3:31:5, Yalkut Yosef (Kitzur S”A 551(2):11) </ref> however, it’s preferable to be strict not to cut the entire three weeks. <Ref>Chazon Ovadyah (Arba Taniyot pg 158-9) </ref>

# Women may shave their legs if necessary. <ref> Rav Moshe Feinstein quoted in Moadei Yeshurun page 128 note 9, Kitzur Hilchot Bein hametzarim page 4. </ref>

# If not cutting one's hair will cause great monetary loss, one is permitted to cut it during the three weeks but not during the nine days. If one will not lose money, even if the hair makes him uncomfortable he may not cut his hair. <ref> Iggerot Moshe OC 4:120 </ref>  

# It is permitted to pluck one’s eyebrows or eyelashes. <ref> Halichot Shelomo 3:14, Devar Halachah 9, Shalmei Moed page 477.  </ref>

* (4) Monetary loss: (a)Sh”t Maharam Shik Y”D 371 writes that there is what to defend those who it’s difficult to do business with important people without shaving and during the year they regularly shave every 2-3 days to continue in the three weeks until the week of Tisha BeAv. (b) Sh”t Igrot Moshe C”M 1:93, O”C 4:102, 5:24:9 writes that by loosing a business deal or customers that will effect one’s income after Tisha BeAv, one can shave until the week of Tisha BeAv, but during the week of Tisha BeAv itself it’s only permissible to shave if one will not be able to make an income after Tisha BeAv or without working one needs to borrow money and it’s difficult to find someone to borrow from). (c) Maadenei Shlomo pg 51 brings Rav Shlomo Zalman Auerbach who says that if there’s a chance you’ll loose you’re job you can shave (even during the week of Tisha BeAv). Halichot Shlomo pg 414 brings Rav Shlomo Zalman Aurbach who says that it’s permissible for a person who is endanger of losing a lot of money or his job may shave during the three weeks. (d)Shearim Metsuyim BeHalacha brings the Taz 551:1 (brought by Mishna Brurah 551:12) that says nowadays we don’t decrease our business activity during this time since we have to pay government taxes and all income is included in our Parnasa and therefore here too if there’s a chance of losing Parnasa that can be considered a concern of loss of money.       

* <div id="shavingforkavodshabbos"></div> (4) Kavod [[Shabbat]]: (a) Magan Avraham 551:14 and Mishna Brurah 551:32 write that the prohibition of cutting hair applies even for Kavod [[Shabbat]] (unlike laundering which is relaxed for Kavod [[Shabbat]] for someone who doesn't have other clothes, because people don't cut their hair either way weekly). Yet, Pri Megadim (A”A 551:14) writes that according to Rama one can shave in honor of [[Shabbat]] until [[Rosh Chodesh]] Av. However, Mateh Yehuda 551:4 writes that even in honor of [[Shabbat]] one can’t shave during the three weeks. (b) On this dispute, Kaf HaChaim 551:66 writes that in this regard in depends on the minhag of the place (to follow the Pri Megadim or not), and Rabbi Moshe Karp in Hilchot UMinhagei Ben HaMeysarim (pg 25) writes that the Pri Megadim was more in line with minhag Ashkenaz than the Mateh Yehuda and there’s a lot to rely on to follow Pri Megadim. (c) Even on the original position of the Magan Avraham, the Hagot Rabbi Akiva Eiger and Buir Halacha 551:3 D”H VeChen (based on Tosfot Tanit and the Yerushalmi) argue that cutting hair should be permissible for Kavod [[Shabbat]] even for [[Shabbat]] Chazon. [However, the Rishonim themselves don’t all agree with Tosfot including the Kol Bo (quoted in Bet Yosef 551:4) who wouldn’t shave before [[Shabbat]] chazon and the Bet Yosef (who argues on Tosfot that it’s impossible to think that it’s permissible to cut hair on Tisha BeAv for Kavod [[Shabbat]]).] (d) Ashkenazim: Sh”t Ner Ezra (vol 2 pg 155-8) concludes that one can be lenient to shave for Kavod [[Shabbat]] and quotes Rav Aharon Lichtenstein who agrees. [http://www.torah.org/advanced/weekly-halacha/5762/pinchas.html Weekly Parsha Halacha by Rabbi Neustadt] writes that since many do shave regularly (more than once a week) there is a basis for the lenient minhag (based on the logic of the Magan Avraham). Nonetheless, the Shemirat Shabbat KeHilchata 42:52 writes simply like the Mishna Brurah not to shave during the three weeks even for Kavod [[Shabbat]]. (e)Sephardim: Rav Ovadyah Yosef (Sh"t Yachava Daat 3:39, Sh”t Yabea Omer 3:31:5; Chazon Ovadyah pg 162) writes that there is what to rely on to shave Friday of [[Shabbat]] Chazon if ones beard is uncomfortable, and certainly there’s what to rely on for Ashkenazim to shave for Kavod [[Shabbat]] during the rest of the three weeks. (e) Someone in doubt: Rabbi Robinowitz (quoted in Peninei Halacha by 156) says that a person should follow the minhag of his father so as not to appear more lenient or strict that his father. </ref>

==Dancing==

# Dancing is forbidden during the three weeks. <Ref> Magan Avraham 551:10 says that it is forbidden to dance during the three weeks. This is brought as Halacha in the Achronim including Eliya Rabba 551:6, Baer Hetiev 551:11, Mishna Brurah 551:16, Yalkut Yosef (Moadim pg 560, Kitzur S”A 551:9), and Chazon Ovadyah (Arba Taaniyot pg 149). </ref>

# On [[Shabbat]] Chazon one shouldn’t wear new clothes. <Ref> Eliyah Rabba 551:17 in name of Madenei [[Yom Tov]] that one should wear new clothes even on [[Shabbat]] during the three weeks because wearing new clothes has a special aspect of happiness (greater than eating a new fruit). So holds the Chaye Adam 133:14, Derech HaChaim 551:6 and Kitzur Shulchan Aruch 122:2 not to wear new clothes all three weeks including [[Shabbat]]. However, Aruch HaShulchan 551:38 writes that one can make [[Shehecheyanu]] before [[Rosh Chodesh]] Av and afterwards one shouldn’t make [[Shehecheyanu]] even on [[Shabbat]] Chazon. Additionally, Mishna Brurah 551:45 writes that even those who are lenient to make [[Shehecheyanu]] on [[Shabbat]] will agree to be strict on [[Shabbat]] Chazon not to wear new clothes (which has a special element of happiness that a new fruit doesn’t have). Sh”t Yechave Daat 1:37 and Torat HaMoadim 5:7 concurs to the opinion of Mishna Brurah. </ref>

# One shouldn’t make a [[Shehecheyanu]] on the night of Sheva Asar BeTamuz, however, is there’s great need, there’s what to rely on. <Ref> Sh”t Sh”t Chaim Shal 1:24, Kaf HaChaim 551:207, Sdei Chemed 5:page 277, Biur Halacha 551:2 and Ikrei HaDaat O”C 27:9 write that one shouldn’t say [[Shehecheyanu]] on the night of Sheva Aser BeTamuz. However, Nechamat Yisrael (pg 40) permits in case of great need based on Sh”t Igrot Moshe O”C 1:168 (so is explicit in Sh”t Igrot Moshe O”C 3:100) and Mishnat Yacov (pg 168) permits [[Shehecheyanu]] at night even without any need. </ref>

==Eating a new fruit or wearing new clothing==

# Since nowadays we don’t make a [[Shehecheyanu]] on buying new clothes but only for wearing new clothes, some permit buying new clothes and some forbid. <Ref> Halichot Shlomo pg 411 brings from the Talmidim of Rav Shlomo Zalman Aurbach that it’s permissible to buy new clothes since nowadays we don’t make a Bracha on buying clothes. This is the ruling of Mishna Berura 441:45 and Kaf Hachayim 551:88. see Nechamet Yisrael pg 40 </ref>

# Many say that it is permissible to sing with one's mouth during the three weeks. <ref> Mekadesh Yisroel (pg 20), Chut Shuni ([[Shabbat]], vol 2, pg 325), Sh"t Shevet HaLevi 3:15, [http://www.thehalacha.com/attach/Volume5/Issue13.pdf Halachically Speaking] (Vol 5, Issue 13, note 46)</ref>

===Non-live A cappella===

===Brit Milah===

# Some permit music at a meal for a Brit Milah during the three weeks. <ref> In general, Rama (551:3) permits music for a dvar mitzvah like a wedding. However, the Yavetz in his siddur (Amudei Shesh; quoted by Yafeh Lelev 560:7) writes that a simcha of a Brit Milah there should be no music. Eliyah Rabba 551:26 writes that the minhag is like the Yavetz. Regarding the three weeks Chida in Sh”t Chaim Shal 1:21 writes that the (Sephardic) minhag is to be lenient to have music at a meal of a Brit Milah. Ikrei HaDaat (Y”D 36:23), Sh”t Maaseh Avraham (Y”D 48), Moed Kol Chai (10:20), Ot Chaim VeShalom (the Munchatch Rebbe; 265:29), Torat HaMoadim 5:4, and Sh”t Yachave Daat 1:45 write that the Sephardic minhag is to lenient by the meal of a Brit Milah. (It seems that Shirei Knesset HaGedolah 551:33 who’s strict regarding the party for a Milah at night, but would agree concerning the meal right after the Milah. Additionally, it seems Sh”t Igrot Moshe 1:166 would agree as he even discusses a tzedaka banquet regarding music the rest of the year.) </ref>

===Pidyon HaBen===

# Some permit music at a meal for a Pidyon HaBen during the three weeks. <Ref> Sh”t Yachave Daat 1:45 permits music at a suedat mitzvah such as a Pidyon HaBen. Torat HaMoadim 5:4 and Yalkut Yosef (Moadim, 5748 edition, pg 554) extend this to even during the three weeks. </ref>

===Bar Mitzvah===

# Some permit music at a meal for a Bar Mitzvah during the three weeks. <Ref> Sh"t Yachava Daat 6:34, Yalkut Yosef (Moadim, 5748 edition, pg 554), and Torat HaMoadim 5:4 permit music at a simchat Bar Mitzvah during the three weeks. However, Darkei Horah (Dinei Ben Hametsarim pg 17, by Rav Asher Weiss) and Natai Gavriel (Ben HaMetzarim chapter 16:3) forbid. Halichot Emet 7:12 writes that the sephardic minhag is to be lenient and ashkenazic minhag is to be strict. [http://www.thehalacha.com/attach/Volume5/Issue13.pdf Halachically Speaking] writes that some are lenient. </ref>

# It is permissible and a mitzvah to learn Torah with a tune and niggun even during the three weeks. <Ref> Sh”t Mishna Halachot 6:107, Sh”t Yachave Daat 6:34, Torat HaMoadim 5:2, Sedei Chemed (Peat Sadeh, Ben HaMetsarim 1:10), </ref>

===A Music teacher or Musician===

===Music Lessons===

==Meat and wine==

# The Ashkenazic and Sephardic custom is to refrain from meat, poultry, and wine during the nine days. Ashkenazim include [[Rosh Chodesh]] in this prohibition, while Sephardim are lenient regarding the day of [[Rosh Chodesh]] itself and some Sephardim are strict. <Ref> The gemara Baba Batra 60b quotes the opinion of Rabbi Yishmael Ben Elisha that after the destruction of the Beit HaMikdash, it would have been appropriate for the rabbis to ban eating meat and drinking wine in order to properly mourn. However, since most of the congregation would not be able to abide by this, the rabbis never made it. Biur HaGra OC 551:9 writes that this is the source for refraining from eating meat and drinking wine prior to Tisha B'Av, that although it is impossible to ban eating meat and drinking wine throuvghout the year, it is possible to refrain from meat and wine for a short period of time.The Mishna in Taanit 26b the Gemara 30a discuss the prohibition of eating meat during the seudat hamakseket prior to tisha b'av. Rambam Hilchot Taaniot 5:6 says that the custom is to extend the prohibition beyond that meal. He says that some don't eat meat during the week of tisha b'av, and some don't eat from rosh chodesh av and onward. S"A 551:9 writes that there are three customs about not eating meat and drinking wine; some refrain only for the week on Tisha BeAv, some refrain for the nine days (from [[Rosh Chodesh]] Av), some refrain for the whole three weeks. Mishna Brurah 551:58 writes that the Ashkenazic custom is not to eat meat or drink wine for the nine days including [[Rosh Chodesh]] Av but excluding Shabbat (Mishna Berura 551:59). This is also written in the [http://www.torah.org/advanced/weekly-halacha/5762/devarim.html Weekly Halacha by Rabbi Neustadt]. Sh"t Yachava Daat 1:41, Moed Likol Chai 9:15 and Kaf Hachayim 551:125 write that the Sephardic custom is to refrain from eating meat and wine during the nine days, however, on [[Rosh Chodesh]] the minhag is to be lenient, however, some are strict. See also Chazon Ovadyah (Arba Taniyot pg 169) and Halachot and History of The Three Weeks (by Rabbi Shlomo Churba, pg 37) who also write that the Sephardic custom is not to eat meat, poultry or wine in the nine days. </ref>

# The sephardic custom is not to do laundry during the week of tisha b'av.<ref> S"A 551:3 based on gemara in taanit 26b. </ref> Ashkenazic custom is to refrain already from Rosh Chodesh Av, <ref> Rama 551:3. </ref> The same applies with wearing freshly laundered clothing even if they were washed prior to these times. <ref> S"A and Rama 551:3, Yechave Daat 1:39 </ref>

# One shouldn't do laundry even if he doesn't plan on wearing the clothes until afterwards, as this distracts him from his mourning. He also should not give it to a non-Jew to do for him. <ref> S"A and Rama 551:3 and Mishna Berura 551:34 </ref>

# In hospitals, it is permitted to clean the linens and clothing because this is done to keep clean for health reasons and not for pleasure. In hotels and motels they can change the linens for new guests because people are disgusted by using what others have already used. <ref> Tzitz Eliezer 13:61 </ref>

# A jewish laundromat that would have no money otherwise may wash non-Jews' clothing during this time. <ref> Mishna Berura 551:43 </ref>  

# Although some have the custom to fast during every day between the seventeenth of tammuz until the ninth of av, this should not be kept by a teacher of torah or somebody who is learning. <ref> Tur 551 and S”A 551:16 as well as the Chayei Adam 133:8 raise this minhag, but Birkei Yosef 551:7, Shaare Teshuva on S”A 551:16, Kaf Hachayim 551:191 and Mishna Berura 90 say that this should not be done by a talmid chacham because he will not be able to focus on learning. </ref>  

==Haftarot==

# On the shabbat prior to Tisha B'av, Shabbat Chazon, we read Isiah Perek 1:1-27 and is the final of the three tragic haftarot.

==Question and Answers==