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Three Weeks: Difference between revisions
From Halachipedia
→Weddings
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==Weddings== | ==Weddings== | ||
# The Ashkenazic custom is not to get married during the three weeks. <ref> Rama 551:2 and Darchei Moshe 551:5 based on the Sefer Haminhagim, Chayei Adam 133:8, Kitzur Shulchan Aruch 122:1, Hilchot UMinhagei Ben HaMetsarim (Rabbi Moshe Karp) 3:1, Nitei Gavriel Bein Hametzarim vol. 1, 14:8 </ref> Among Sephardim, some have just the custom not to get married during the [[nine days]] (from [[Rosh Chodesh]] Av until [[Tisha BeAv]]) <ref> Shulchan Aruch 551:2, based on gemara Yevamot 43b, Yalkut Yosef (Moadim, 5748 edition, pg 554, Chazon Ovadyah (Arba Taaniyot pg 140), Sh"t Yabia Omer OC 6:43, Sh"t Yechave Daat 1:36, Sh"t Or Litzion 3:25:1 </ref> and some have the custom not to get married the entire three weeks. <ref> Ben Ish Chai Parashat Devarim Halacha 4 based on the Shyarei Knesset Hagedola, Sdei Chemed 6 Marechet Bein Hametzarim 1:10, [http://www.dailyhalacha.com/displayRead.asp?readID=946 Rabbi Mansour on DailyHalacha.com] says that this is the Syrian minhag. </ref> | # The Ashkenazic custom is not to get married during the three weeks. <ref> Rama 551:2 and Darchei Moshe 551:5 based on the Sefer Haminhagim, Chayei Adam 133:8, Kitzur Shulchan Aruch 122:1, Hilchot UMinhagei Ben HaMetsarim (Rabbi Moshe Karp) 3:1, Nitei Gavriel Bein Hametzarim vol. 1, 14:8. On the night of Shiva Asar Bitammuz itself, Rav Moshe Feinstein (OC 168) is lenient, while Tzitz Eliezer 10:26 is strict. </ref> Among Sephardim, some have just the custom not to get married during the [[nine days]] (from [[Rosh Chodesh]] Av until [[Tisha BeAv]]) <ref> Shulchan Aruch 551:2, based on gemara Yevamot 43b, Yalkut Yosef (Moadim, 5748 edition, pg 554, Chazon Ovadyah (Arba Taaniyot pg 140), Sh"t Yabia Omer OC 6:43, Sh"t Yechave Daat 1:36, Sh"t Or Litzion 3:25:1 </ref> and some have the custom not to get married the entire three weeks. <ref> Ben Ish Chai Parashat Devarim Halacha 4 based on the Shyarei Knesset Hagedola, Sdei Chemed 6 Marechet Bein Hametzarim 1:10, [http://www.dailyhalacha.com/displayRead.asp?readID=946 Rabbi Mansour on DailyHalacha.com] says that this is the Syrian minhag. </ref> | ||
# Some say that it is permitted for an Ashkenazi to attend a sefardi wedding before [[Rosh Chodesh]] Av, and they may even dance at the wedding. <ref> Nitei Gavriel Bein Hametzarim vol. 1, 14:10, Teshuvot Vihanhagot 4:128 </ref> Others hold that it is forbidden. <ref>Rivevot Ephraim 6:289</ref> | # Some say that it is permitted for an Ashkenazi to attend a sefardi wedding before [[Rosh Chodesh]] Av, and they may even dance at the wedding. <ref> Nitei Gavriel Bein Hametzarim vol. 1, 14:10, Teshuvot Vihanhagot 4:128 </ref> Others hold that it is forbidden. <ref>Rivevot Ephraim 6:289</ref> | ||
# Technically, it is permitted to get married on Motzaei [[Tisha BeAv]], but some have the custom not to. If one is unsure what his custom is, he can be lenient and rely on the ikar hadin that it is permitted. <ref> Sh"t Yabia Omer 2:23:16, Sh"t Yechave Daat 5:41. </ref> | # Technically, it is permitted to get married on Motzaei [[Tisha BeAv]], but some have the custom not to. If one is unsure what his custom is, he can be lenient and rely on the ikar hadin that it is permitted. <ref> Sh"t Yabia Omer 2:23:16, Sh"t Yechave Daat 5:41. </ref> | ||
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# The chattan and kallah to wear Shabbat clothing to their engagement party. <ref> Halichos Shlomo Moadim 2:14:4 </ref> | # The chattan and kallah to wear Shabbat clothing to their engagement party. <ref> Halichos Shlomo Moadim 2:14:4 </ref> | ||
# Some poskim allow buying the engagement ring during the nine days<ref>Rav Shlomo Zalman Auerbach in Shalmei Simcha page 61 </ref>, while others are strict unless there will be a financial loss.<ref> Igros Moshe E.H. 4:84 </ref> | # Some poskim allow buying the engagement ring during the nine days<ref>Rav Shlomo Zalman Auerbach in Shalmei Simcha page 61 </ref>, while others are strict unless there will be a financial loss.<ref> Igros Moshe E.H. 4:84 </ref> | ||
==Meals with Friends== | ==Meals with Friends== | ||
# Some say that it is forbidden to have meals with friends during the nine days. <Ref>Aruch Hashulchan 551:8</ref> However, if it isn't a meal but only desserts, that is okay.<ref>Nitai Gavriel (Ben Hametzarim 16:1) based on Magen Avraham 551:10</ref> | # Some say that it is forbidden to have meals with friends during the nine days. <Ref>Aruch Hashulchan 551:8</ref> However, if it isn't a meal but only desserts, that is okay.<ref>Nitai Gavriel (Ben Hametzarim 16:1) based on Magen Avraham 551:10</ref> | ||
