Harchakot of Niddah: Difference between revisions

# A man is required to separate from his wife during the time she is a niddah until she has a hefsek taharah, counts seven clean days and dips in a kosher mikveh. <Ref> Torat HaTaharah p. 95, Taharat Yosef 3:1 </ref>

# This prohibition remains even if many years have passed since she became a niddah. It remains until she has a hefsek taharah, counts seven clean days, and dips in a kosher mikveh. <ref> Torat HaTaharah p. 95, Taharat Yosef 3:2</ref>

# A man is permitted to be alone ([[yichud]]) in a room or house with his wife when she is a niddah. However, a man may not have [[yichud]] with any other woman, married or single.<ref> Taharat Yosef 3:4 </ref>

 

==Passing Items when a Woman is Niddah==

# A man may not pass an item directly to his wife when she is a niddah, nor may he receive an item directly from her, lest they come to touch. In order to pass an object, they must place the item down on a table or chair for the spouse to pick up from there. <ref> Torat HaTaharah p. 98, Taharat Yosef 3:7</ref>

# A couple may not even pass a long object, such as a bench to each other when the woman is a niddah. In extenuating circumstances though, there is room for leniency, if they can be sure to avoid touching each other in the process. For example, if a couple lives on a high floor and there is no elevator, and they need to carry a baby stroller up and down stairs, and it cannot be carried by just one of them, the couple may be lenient and have the husband carry the bottom of the stroller and the wife the top, or vice versa, as long as they can be sure they will not touch in doing so. The law is the same with getting a stroller on or off the bus, or other similar situations. <ref> Torat HaTaharah p. 98-99, Taharat Yosef 3:7</ref>

# A man is permitted to throw an object to his wife when she is a niddah, as long as it is not done in a lightheaded, frivolous, playful manner. One who is strict and refrains from doing so is praiseworthy, however. This only applies for Sepharadim. For Ashkenazim, the strict ruling is the law, and according to them, a man is not permitted to throw an object to his wife when she is a niddah. Even Ashkenazim may be lenient if the man throws the object into the air, and the wife catches it on the way down. <ref> Torat HaTaharah p. 99, Taharat Yosef 3:7:3</ref>

# At a berit milah (bris or circumcision) if the mother wants to hand the baby to her husband who is the sandakthe person who holds the baby on his lap during the berit), it is the Sephardic custom to be lenient by having the baby placed on top of two pillows. The woman holds the baby by placing her hands underneath the bottom pillow, and the husband takes the baby from her by lifting the top pillow along with the baby, while the bottom pillow remains with the mother. (In this way they avoid touching). This custom has deep roots among the great Sephardic sages and the Ge'onim. The Ashkenazim though, are strict in this matter. A woman who just gave birth may not pass the baby directly to her husband who is the sandak. Rather, another man should take the baby from her and hand him over to the father. <ref> Torat HaTaharah p. 99-100, Taharat Yosef 3:7:4</ref>

# When a woman is a niddah, a couple is permitted to pass a child to one another, as long as they will not touch, and as long as the child is able to go from one parent to the other on his own, since he is essentially carrying himself (nos'eh et asmo). However, one who is strict and refrains from doing so is praiseworthy. This is for Sepharadim. Ashkenazim though, who are strict regarding throwing an object to one another, should be particularly scrupulous in this matter as well. <ref> Torat HaTaharah p. 100, Taharat Yosef 3:7:5</ref> However, even those who are lenient to pass a child when the wife is a niddah, should be strict if the child is extremely small, even if it can go from one to the other by itself (because its size increases the likelihood they will touch). Another case they should be strict is if the child is ill God forbid and too weak to go from one spouse to the other on its own. <ref> Torat HaTaharah p. 100</ref> Even when the baby is able to "carry" itself and go from one spouse to the other on its own, the couple should still pass the child to one another only when it is really necessary. For example, if the baby is crying and will suffer if the father does not take him from the mother. <ref> Torat HaTaharah p. 100, Taharat Yosef 3:7:5</ref>

# It is preferable that a person be strict to not feed his baby while his wife who is a niddah is holding the baby. If necessary though, they may be lenient, if they are careful not to touch each other. <ref> Torat HaTaharah p. 100, Taharat Yosef 3:7:6</ref>