Socializing with Non-Jews: Difference between revisions
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# The Gemara tells how one Amora would take the sheichar out the door of the | # The Gemara tells how one Amora would take the sheichar out the door of the non-Jew's home in order to drink it, while a different Amora would go all the way back home.<ref>Avodah Zarah 31b.</ref> At that point, the concern for intermarriage no longer applies.<ref>Rif, Rabbeinu Chananel, Ramban, Talmidei Rabbeinu Yonah, Rosh 2:15, Ran, and Tosafot Rid ad loc, Beit Yosef Yoreh Deah 114:1</ref> In practice, one can be lenient and drink once he has fully exited the place of sale, but there is definitely room to follow the second opinion either due to interest in being stringent or because the Halacha follows it.<ref>Most authorities (Rif, Tosafot, Rashba) argue that the second Amora was only acting stringently on himself, but the Rambam (Maachalot Assurot 17:10) took him more seriously and holds like him. Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 114:1 presents the language of the Rambam, but Pri Chadash Yoreh Deah 114:3 and Darkei Teshuva 114:3 disagree. In the Pri Chadash's view, the second, more stringent Amora only went all the way home because he was a regular. A person who doesn't go regularly can even drink in the doorway of the place of sale. Mizmor leDavid (Pardo, ad loc.), Chochmat Adam 66:14, Aruch HaShulchan Yoreh Deah 114:10, and Zivchei Tzedek 114:3 argue back in favor of Shulchan Aruch's ruling and note that the Rama doesn't even disagree. However, the Shulchan Gavoah interprets Rambam and, by extension, Shulchan Aruch to not be literal in their insistence on going all the way home.</ref> | ||
# Therefore, even in a kosher restaurant, if it's owned by a non-Jew, a Sephardi<ref>see the leniency for Ashkenazim above</ref> may not have a beer at the bar; rather, he must take it and sit down at a table in the other room.<ref>[https://www.yutorah.org/sidebar/lecture.cfm/895256/rabbi-dovid-cohen-crc-/alcoholic-beverages-2-siman-114-sif-1b-drinking-in-a-non-jew-s-bar-or-home-source-of-the-prohibition-which-locations-which-beverages-/ R' Dovid Cohen (cRc)]</ref> | # Therefore, even in a kosher restaurant, if it's owned by a non-Jew, a Sephardi<ref>see the leniency for Ashkenazim above</ref> may not have a beer at the bar; rather, he must take it and sit down at a table in the other room.<ref>[https://www.yutorah.org/sidebar/lecture.cfm/895256/rabbi-dovid-cohen-crc-/alcoholic-beverages-2-siman-114-sif-1b-drinking-in-a-non-jew-s-bar-or-home-source-of-the-prohibition-which-locations-which-beverages-/ R' Dovid Cohen (cRc)]</ref> | ||
# One who is staying overnight in a non-Jews home (such as in an inn or hotel), and one who is hosting the | # One who is staying overnight in a non-Jews home (such as in an inn or hotel), and one who is hosting the non-Jew in his home, however, can be lenient, because of Eivah. The prohibition preventing intermarriage applies only in the context of a drinking party in the store or regularly in the non-Jew's home.<ref>Sefer HaTerumah 158, Tosfot Avodah Zarah 31b s.v. Utravayhu, Talmidei Rabbeinu Yonah and Ritva ad loc, Ohr Zarua Avodah Zarah 163, Rosh Avodah Zarah 2:15 adds that "Gedolei Eretz HaEey (England) were lenient, Mordechai Avodah Zarah 819, Hagahot Maimoniot, Tur and Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 114:1, Kenesset HaGedolah Hagahot Beit Yosef 114:10, Zivchei Tzedek 114:6-7, Kaf HaChaim Yoreh Deah 114:7</ref> | ||
# In other words, if one is participating in a fashion which is both "aray" (informal, unestablished) and "akrai" (seldom, three or fewer times), it is permissible. Meaning, drinking in an established fashion ("keva" instead of "aray") even once is a problem, and more than three times (ragil) even informally (be'akrai) are still problematic. | # In other words, if one is participating in a fashion which is both "aray" (informal, unestablished) and "akrai" (seldom, three or fewer times), it is permissible. Meaning, drinking in an established fashion ("keva" instead of "aray") even once is a problem, and more than three times (ragil) even informally (be'akrai) are still problematic. | ||
# One may also send someone to bring him Sheichar from a | # One may also send someone to bring him Sheichar from a non-Jew in the city and drink it bederech keva in his own home.<ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 114:1, Kaf HaChaim Yoreh Deah 114:8</ref> | ||
# See page on [[Marit Ayin/Suspicious actions|Marit Ayin]] for relevant halachot in these situations. | # See page on [[Marit Ayin/Suspicious actions|Marit Ayin]] for relevant halachot in these situations. | ||
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# The prohibition also applies to a case where there are an equal amount of Jews and non-Jews.<ref>Pri Chadash 114:1</ref> Where there are more Jews than non-Jews in one's social group or table at a party, the prohibitions do not apply.<ref>Rambam Ma'achalot Asurot 17:9-10</ref> | # The prohibition also applies to a case where there are an equal amount of Jews and non-Jews.<ref>Pri Chadash 114:1</ref> Where there are more Jews than non-Jews in one's social group or table at a party, the prohibitions do not apply.<ref>Rambam Ma'achalot Asurot 17:9-10</ref> | ||
#If there is no wine or beer present, some hold that one may attend a party with more non-Jews than Jews at his table or immediate social group, and he may eat (kosher food) and drink other beverages. <ref>Ben Yisroel Lenochri pg. 324 according to his interpretation of Rambam Maachalot Asurot 17:9-10.</ref> Some hold one would still not be able to eat or drink other beverages in such a case. <ref>Lechem Mishna on the Rambam Maachalot Asurot 17:9-10, Pri Chadash 114:101 according to his interpretation of Rambam Maachalot Asurot 17:9-10.</ref> | #If there is no wine or beer present, some hold that one may attend a party with more non-Jews than Jews at his table or immediate social group, and he may eat (kosher food) and drink other beverages. <ref>Ben Yisroel Lenochri pg. 324 according to his interpretation of Rambam Maachalot Asurot 17:9-10.</ref> Some hold one would still not be able to eat or drink other beverages in such a case. <ref>Lechem Mishna on the Rambam Maachalot Asurot 17:9-10, Pri Chadash 114:101 according to his interpretation of Rambam Maachalot Asurot 17:9-10.</ref> | ||
#It is forbidden to do a parlor meeting in a non-Jew's house because it is like having a party with non-Jews at their house.<ref>Igrot Moshe YD 2:117</ref> | |||
# It isn't proper to honor a non-Jew at a fundraising banquet if doing so will generate donations.<ref>Igrot Moshe YD 2:117 explains that it is a problem to accept donations that were given because of the non-Jew since that would constitute a chilul Hashem since it is public. It would only be permitted if the institution couldn't support itself at all unless it did this. Even so it is improper to honor the non-Jew for the fundraiser even if there is a way to permit it.</ref> | |||
==Attending Office Parties== | ==Attending Office Parties== | ||
