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Shalom Zachar: Difference between revisions
From Halachipedia
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Text replace - "Yom Kippur" to "Yom Kippur"
(Created page with 'Rabbi Ari Enkin personally sent us this article from one of the volumes of his book "Amot Shel Halacha" <br> ==Basics of Shalom Zachor== # There is a much-loved Ashkenazi custom …') |
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# It is ideal for the shalom zachar to be held in the presence of the baby even if he had not yet been discharged from the hospital. This is reminiscent of the halacha that one is not to console mourners outside of the house of mourning.<ref> Teshuvot V'hanhagot 2:202; Otzar Habrit p. 89.</ref> It is also noted that one of the purposes of the shalom zachar is specifically to "visit the infant". Ultimately, however, the shalom zachar may be held even without the presence of the baby. This frequently occurs when a woman gives birth close to Shabbat and must remain in the hospital over Shabbat along with the baby. In such a situation the father of the baby can hold the shalom zachar at home, as usual.<ref> Teshuvot V'hanhagot 2:202; For a discussion on this issue see: Hegyonei Haparasha, Tazria p.208.</ref> | # It is ideal for the shalom zachar to be held in the presence of the baby even if he had not yet been discharged from the hospital. This is reminiscent of the halacha that one is not to console mourners outside of the house of mourning.<ref> Teshuvot V'hanhagot 2:202; Otzar Habrit p. 89.</ref> It is also noted that one of the purposes of the shalom zachar is specifically to "visit the infant". Ultimately, however, the shalom zachar may be held even without the presence of the baby. This frequently occurs when a woman gives birth close to Shabbat and must remain in the hospital over Shabbat along with the baby. In such a situation the father of the baby can hold the shalom zachar at home, as usual.<ref> Teshuvot V'hanhagot 2:202; For a discussion on this issue see: Hegyonei Haparasha, Tazria p.208.</ref> | ||
# The shalom zachar gathering is considered to be a seudat mitzva, a meal whose status is a mitzva.<ref> Rema, YD 265:12.</ref> Although in our day only snacks and drinks are generally served at a shalom zachar, in ancient times it was customary to serve an entire meal.<ref> Derisha, OC 305.</ref> There was also a custom to visit the mother on the morning following the shalom zachar to partake of refreshments and wish her mazal tov.<ref> Aruch Hashulchan, YD 265:37. See Tosfot, Moed Katan 28a.</ref> Even in a situation where it is known that the brit will be delayed for quite some time, the shalom zachar should still be held on the Friday night following the birth, though there does exist a custom to postpone the shalom zachar to the Friday night closest to the brit. When a baby is born on Friday night, some families hold the shalom zachar that same night<ref> Pri Megadim, M.Z. 444:9</ref> while others postpone it to the next Friday night, which is the night before the brit will take place.<ref> See Hegyonei Haparasha, Tazria p.208 for more on this.</ref> In the event that a baby boy is born in the week on which Yom Kippur falls out on Shabbat, the shalom zachar should be held on Thursday night<ref> Rivevot V'yovlot 4:233.</ref> though there are those who hold it on Friday night, as usual, offering guests the opportunity to recite the blessing upon fragrant flowers and spices since food cannot be served. | # The shalom zachar gathering is considered to be a seudat mitzva, a meal whose status is a mitzva.<ref> Rema, YD 265:12.</ref> Although in our day only snacks and drinks are generally served at a shalom zachar, in ancient times it was customary to serve an entire meal.<ref> Derisha, OC 305.</ref> There was also a custom to visit the mother on the morning following the shalom zachar to partake of refreshments and wish her mazal tov.<ref> Aruch Hashulchan, YD 265:37. See Tosfot, Moed Katan 28a.</ref> Even in a situation where it is known that the brit will be delayed for quite some time, the shalom zachar should still be held on the Friday night following the birth, though there does exist a custom to postpone the shalom zachar to the Friday night closest to the brit. When a baby is born on Friday night, some families hold the shalom zachar that same night<ref> Pri Megadim, M.Z. 444:9</ref> while others postpone it to the next Friday night, which is the night before the brit will take place.<ref> See Hegyonei Haparasha, Tazria p.208 for more on this.</ref> In the event that a baby boy is born in the week on which [[Yom Kippur]] falls out on Shabbat, the shalom zachar should be held on Thursday night<ref> Rivevot V'yovlot 4:233.</ref> though there are those who hold it on Friday night, as usual, offering guests the opportunity to recite the blessing upon fragrant flowers and spices since food cannot be served. | ||
==For a girl== | ==For a girl== | ||
