Marrying More than One Wife: Difference between revisions

#Prior to the enactment of the Cherem D'Rabbeinu Gershom, a woman could be divorced regardless of whether or not she consented<ref>Yevamos 112b, Rambam Hilchos Geirushin 1:2, Tur [https://www.sefaria.org/Shulchan_Arukh,_Even_HaEzer.119.6?lang=he-en&utm_source=sef_linker Even HaEzer 119:6]</ref> and whether or not her husband could pay for her Ketubah/financial needs after the divorce.<ref>Though she would have the right to sue her ex-husband in Beis Din afterwards for the money owed to her. Rama, [https://www.sefaria.org/Shulchan_Arukh,_Even_HaEzer.119.6?lang=he-en&utm_source=sef_linker Even HaEzer 119:6] </ref>. After the Cherem D'Rabbeinu Gershom was put into place it, became prohibited for a man to divorce his wife without her knowledge, even if he could pay the amount of her Ketubah<ref>Rama, [https://www.sefaria.org/Shulchan_Arukh,_Even_HaEzer.119.6?lang=he-en&utm_source=sef_linker Even HaEzer 119:6], citing the Teshuvos HaRosh.</ref>

#Reasons for the Cherem included to prevent abusive and womanizing husbands from abusing their wives and divorcing them for frivolous reasons<ref>Shu"t MaHarik ibid.</ref> and to equate a woman's power in terms of a divorce to that of a man so women can not be degraded by forced divorces.<ref>Shu"t HaRosh Klal 42:1</ref> Others are of the opinion that the Cherem is a bona fide siyag (protective fence) to the Torah- one should not forcibly divorce his wife, even if by strict halacha he would be justified to do so (eirvas davar), lest someone seek to forcibly divorce his wife for a reason that is not valid.<ref>Shu"t Ein Yitzchak, [https://www.sefaria.org/Shulchan_Arukh,_Even_HaEzer.4.20?lang=he-en&utm_source=sef_linker Even HaEzer 4:20]. The Chasam Sofer (Shu"t Chasam Sofer Even HaEzer 1:3) also believes this segment of the Cherem D'Rabbeinu Gershom is a siyag for the reason that is brought by Shu"t Maharik- to prevent spousal abuse and divorce for frivolous reasons</ref> Finally, some point out that these two segments of the Cherem (not marrying more than one wife and not forcibly divorcing a woman) had to be established together, lest a husband threaten to marry another woman, a deed that would cause his wife to become an Agunah.<ref>Shu"t Shoel U'Maishiv, 1st Edition, 1:178</ref>

#The first of them is that after the Cherem D'Rabbeinu Gershom went into effect in approximately 1000 CE, it was meant to be in effect until the end of the fifth millennium of the Jewish calendar, which translates to the fall of 1239 CE.<ref>Beis Yosef, Even HaEzer 1:9, quoting the Teshuvos HaRashba found in Shu"t MaHarik, Shoresh 101</ref> According to this position, the bans (without the curse placed on the violators) are extended to this day as a matter of custom.<ref>Shu"t Beis Yosef, Dinei Ketuvos 14. Darchei Moshe, Even HaEzer 1:9.</ref> This view maintains that Rabbeinu Gershom did not have the power to extend it himself indefinitely, as this is a Takanah (rabbinic decree) and extending it indefinitely would constitute a violation of Ba'al Tosif (unauthorized adding to the Torah).<ref>Pischei Teshuva, Even HaEzer 1, Seif Katan 19. Shu"t Avnei Nezer, Even HaEzer 1:8:8</ref> Nonetheless, the generations thereafter extended it, keeping it in effect.

#The other major opinion is that the Cherem D'Rabbeinu Gershom was meant to be in effect indefinitely. This position maintains that the practice to forbid polygamy because of the Cherem D'Rabbeinu Gershom continued well beyond 1239 CE<ref>Yam Shel Shlomo on Yevamos, 6:41 who states that the Or Zaruah, Mordechai and Sma"k were of this opinion as well. Additional reasons he posits are that the the substance of the Cherem D'Rabbeinu Gershom is still applicable today and that the original Takanah never specified a time limit in its text.</ref> and that the argument that the Cherem D'Rabneinu Gershom was only meant to last until 1239 CE anyhow is not sufficient to establish the halacha accordingly.<ref>Shu"t Chacham Tzvi 124</ref> Others claim that the Cherem D'Rabbeinu Gershom acts as a Beis Din, an institution that has the power to obligate its subjects and their decedents to its decrees with repeal only possible via a similar Beis Din of number and stature, allowing it to be in place permanently.<ref>Yam Shel Shlomo, ibid.</ref> Those who are of this opinion do not believe the Cherem has an issue of Ba'al Tosif either since it was instituted as a siyag (like other Gezairos of Chazal)<ref>Shu"t Mishkenos Yaakov, Even HaEzer 1</ref>, or because it can be suspended in certain situations with the Heter Me'ah Rabbanim (see "Contemporary Relevance").

#If the woman has become mentally incapacitated or clinically insane and is unlikely to recover.<ref>Bach, Even HaEzer 1:9, "U'medina". The Bach later on states that in such cases, even if the heter is approved, the husband is still financially responsible for his first wife's care, even after the marriage has been terminated. See his comments on Even HaEzer Siman 119:7</ref>

The Heter Me'ah Rabbanim process is one that is still used to this day. Thanks to modern technology and communication methods, it is easier today than ever before to complete the process of Heter Me'ah Rabbanim. With this said, such a process must be conducted with the help of reputable authorities and through the protocols mentioned above. If not, a system that is used to prevent the abuse of husbands can be used to equally abuse wives, an outcome just as unfair and horrific.