Hilchot Nedarim: Difference between revisions
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=== Trying Situations === | === Trying Situations === | ||
# One may take a Neder in a challenging, trying time ("Et Tzarah").<ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 203:6</ref> It's a Mitzvah to fulfill a Neder taken ''Be'et Tzarah''; however, it's debatable if such a Neder can be annulled. Some are only lenient in extremely difficult situations, so it's recommended one refrain from articulating it as a Neder and instead donate the money to Tzedaka at the earliest opportunity.<ref>Ben Ish Chai (Shanah Shniah, Re'eh 3)</ref> | # One may take a Neder in a challenging, trying time ("Et Tzarah").<ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 203:6</ref> It's a Mitzvah to fulfill a Neder taken ''Be'et Tzarah''; however, it's debatable if such a Neder can be annulled. Some are only lenient in extremely difficult situations, so it's recommended one refrain from articulating it as a Neder and instead donate the money to Tzedaka at the earliest opportunity.<ref>Ben Ish Chai (Shanah Shniah, Re'eh 3)</ref> | ||
===Nidrei Mitzvah=== | ===Nidrei Mitzvah, Minhag Tov, and General Minhagim=== | ||
# Nedarim and Shevuot may be taken as means of strengthening one's religious commitment, both in terms of fulfilling positive Mitzvot and evading the violation of negative ones.<ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 203:6</ref> | # Nedarim and Shevuot may be taken as means of strengthening one's religious commitment, both in terms of fulfilling positive Mitzvot and evading the violation of negative ones.<ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 203:6</ref> | ||
# However, one must be extremely careful when taking a Neder or Shevua in the context of Mitzvot, because even the more innocuous formulation will actually be binding.<ref>Nedarim 8a, Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 213:2, Shach YD 203:6. Rav Yosef Dov HaLevi Soloveitchik once went three hours overtime in his regular lecture, which was usually two hours long, on a Thursday in Yeshiva University, to the astonishment of his students. Those who remained by the time he stopped were further astounded to discover he did so because the previous week he had told the class that "Next week we will finish the chapter." and explained how that alone was enough to be considered a binding Neder. Since they didn't even finish, they had to seek out students who weren't in their class to form a Beit Din for Hatarat Nedarim. ([http://www.otzar.org/wotzar/book.aspx?64100&pageid=P0243 Nefesh HaRav pg. 235])</ref> | # However, one must be extremely careful when taking a Neder or Shevua in the context of Mitzvot, because even the more innocuous formulation will actually be binding.<ref>Nedarim 8a, Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 213:2, Shach YD 203:6. Rav Yosef Dov HaLevi Soloveitchik once went three hours overtime in his regular lecture, which was usually two hours long, on a Thursday in Yeshiva University, to the astonishment of his students. Those who remained by the time he stopped were further astounded to discover he did so because the previous week he had told the class that "Next week we will finish the chapter." and explained how that alone was enough to be considered a binding Neder. Since they didn't even finish, they had to seek out students who weren't in their class to form a Beit Din for Hatarat Nedarim. ([http://www.otzar.org/wotzar/book.aspx?64100&pageid=P0243 Nefesh HaRav pg. 235])</ref> | ||
# A vow to move to Eretz Yisrael or make a pilgrimage to the graves of Tzaddikim is a Neder Mitzvah and only subject to annulment in extreme situations.<ref>Ben Ish Chai (Shanah Shniah 6)</ref> | # A vow to move to Eretz Yisrael or make a pilgrimage to the graves of Tzaddikim is a Neder Mitzvah and only subject to annulment in extreme situations.<ref>Ben Ish Chai (Shanah Shniah 6)</ref> | ||
# One who wishes to fast on [[Erev Rosh Chodesh]], during [[Shovavim]], or during [[Yamim Noraim]] should verbally stipulate before he begins to that he does not wish to accept this good practice as a Neder but rather to do it when he wishes and not when he doesn't. Each time he does wish to fast, he should accept the fast the day before. If he began without this stipulation and now wants to discontinue his lofty optional practice, for example, because it's too difficult, he must first perform [[Hatarat Nedarim]]. He should not regret all the Mitzvot he did until now, but rather regret accepting the practice as a Neder passively and not preceding it by saying "Bli Neder."<ref>Ben Ish Chai (Shanah Shniah, Re'eh 17)</ref> | |||
# Refraining from performing actions which are permitted because one incorrectly thinks they're prohibited is considered a mistaken Neder and does not require Hatarat Nedarim to permit.<ref>See Shulchan Aruch (Yoreh Deah 214) at length</ref> Even if one thought it was a grave sin and then discovers it's merely a stringency, it is not considered a Neder<ref>Ben Ish Chai (Shanah Shniah, Re'eh 17)</ref> | |||
===Nidrei Issur=== | ===Nidrei Issur=== | ||
# Nedarim Siyag LePrishut: Taking a Neder to adjust one's personal attributes and tendencies is a form of serving Hashem. Examples include controlling one's extravagant appetite for meat and wine by taking a Neder against eating them for a period of time. Similarly, forbidding oneself from general indulgences is a means of bringing oneself to lesser focus on materialism. <b>Nevertheless, one shouldn't become accustomed to taking Nidrei Issur (Prohibitive Nedarim). Instead, one should abstain from the actions and entities that he wishes to abstain from but without taking a Neder in the first place.</b><ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 203:7, Ben Ish Chai (Shanah Shniah, Re'eh 4)</ref> | # Nedarim Siyag LePrishut: Taking a Neder to adjust one's personal attributes and tendencies is a form of serving Hashem. Examples include controlling one's extravagant appetite for meat and wine by taking a Neder against eating them for a period of time. Similarly, forbidding oneself from general indulgences is a means of bringing oneself to lesser focus on materialism. <b>Nevertheless, one shouldn't become accustomed to taking Nidrei Issur (Prohibitive Nedarim). Instead, one should abstain from the actions and entities that he wishes to abstain from but without taking a Neder in the first place.</b><ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 203:7, Ben Ish Chai (Shanah Shniah, Re'eh 4)</ref> | ||
# Unlike [[Shevuot]], which take effect on the person, Nedarim take effect on the object, therefore, a one can take a Neder to not perform a Mitzvah but not a Shevuah. The Jewish People are "Mushbaim veOmdim MeHar Sinai" previously under oath at Sinai to perform the Mitzvot, and a Shevuah cannot negate another Shevuah. One who takes such a Shevuah is subject to Malkot, as it's a [[Shevuat Shav]]. At the same time, if one took a general Shevuah that prohibited more than just this Mitzvah, it would take effect.<ref>Ben Ish Chai (Shanah Shniah, Parashat Re'eh 19)</ref> | |||
== Formulating Nedarim == | == Formulating Nedarim == | ||
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# Additionally, we follow the understood intention of the one taking the Neder than solely following his words, when he takes a Neder relevant solely to himself.<ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 218:1. See commentaries at length.</ref> | # Additionally, we follow the understood intention of the one taking the Neder than solely following his words, when he takes a Neder relevant solely to himself.<ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 218:1. See commentaries at length.</ref> | ||
=== Ikar HaNeder & Hatfasah BaDavar HaNadur === | === Ikar HaNeder & Hatfasah BaDavar HaNadur === | ||
# The essential form of a Neder entails declaring that a permitted object be prohibited and be associated with an object which itself is the product of a previous vow (Davar HaNadur). For example, "This loaf of bread should be prohibited to me like a Korban," because a Korban is an inherently permitted animal that is sanctified via a Neder. <ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 204:1</ref> | # The essential form of a Neder entails declaring that a permitted object be prohibited and be associated with an object which itself is the product of a previous vow (Davar HaNadur). For example, "This loaf of bread should be prohibited to me like a Korban," because a Korban is an inherently permitted animal that is sanctified via a Neder.<ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 204:1</ref> | ||
# Similarly, if one already prohibited an object upon himself, he can then subsequently prohibit another object by associating it with this one. For example, "This loaf of bread should be prohibited to me like that one (which he already prohibited via a Neder)." <ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 204:1, Ben Ish Chai (Shanah Shniah 8). Language based on ArtScroll commentary to Nedarim 14a</ref> | # Similarly, if one already prohibited an object upon himself, he can then subsequently prohibit another object by associating it with this one. For example, "This loaf of bread should be prohibited to me like that one (which he already prohibited via a Neder)." <ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 204:1, Ben Ish Chai (Shanah Shniah 8). Language based on ArtScroll commentary to Nedarim 14a</ref> | ||
# The associated object need not be a Korban, but, rather, it can be anything that is sanctified with one's speech.<ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 204:2</ref> | # The associated object need not be a Korban, but, rather, it can be anything that is sanctified with one's speech.<ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 204:2</ref> | ||
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# A Neder fundamentally differs from a Shevua in that a Neder is a prohibition that takes effect on the item vowed upon, while a Shevua takes effect on the person. As such, the subject of a Neder must be the item at hand ("This item should be prohibited to me"), and the subject of a Shevua must be the person ("It should be prohibited for me to do this action"). If a Neder is formulated in the language of a Shevua, there's is a great debate if it takes effect at all or at least on the level of a Yad, and many opine that it is ineffective, unless it's with respect to performing a Mitzvah. Nevertheless, because it has become commonplace to take Nedarim in such a language, one should not be lenient, lest people become even more lax with Nedarim.<ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 206:5 as a Stam vaYesh to be lenient Min HaTorah or not. See Shach Yoreh Deah 206:9 for details with respect to parameters of formulation. The Ben Ish Chai (Shanah Shniah 5) is stringent as a means of safeguard, but Rav Ovadia (Yabia Omer vol. 8 Yoreh Deah 20:1-2) argues that we follow the Stam LeGamrei, especially because the Yesh is a minority in face of the numerous Rishonim who are lenient. He allows a woman who took a Neder beLashon Shevua to not observe it at all to protect Shalom Bayit.</ref> | # A Neder fundamentally differs from a Shevua in that a Neder is a prohibition that takes effect on the item vowed upon, while a Shevua takes effect on the person. As such, the subject of a Neder must be the item at hand ("This item should be prohibited to me"), and the subject of a Shevua must be the person ("It should be prohibited for me to do this action"). If a Neder is formulated in the language of a Shevua, there's is a great debate if it takes effect at all or at least on the level of a Yad, and many opine that it is ineffective, unless it's with respect to performing a Mitzvah. Nevertheless, because it has become commonplace to take Nedarim in such a language, one should not be lenient, lest people become even more lax with Nedarim.<ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 206:5 as a Stam vaYesh to be lenient Min HaTorah or not. See Shach Yoreh Deah 206:9 for details with respect to parameters of formulation. The Ben Ish Chai (Shanah Shniah 5) is stringent as a means of safeguard, but Rav Ovadia (Yabia Omer vol. 8 Yoreh Deah 20:1-2) argues that we follow the Stam LeGamrei, especially because the Yesh is a minority in face of the numerous Rishonim who are lenient. He allows a woman who took a Neder beLashon Shevua to not observe it at all to protect Shalom Bayit.</ref> | ||
# Some argue that Nezirut is outside the scope of this discussion and would take effect regardless, while others disagree.<ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 206:5. See Shach Yoreh Deah 206:10 and Rabbi Akiva Eiger ad loc.</ref> | # Some argue that Nezirut is outside the scope of this discussion and would take effect regardless, while others disagree.<ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 206:5. See Shach Yoreh Deah 206:10 and Rabbi Akiva Eiger ad loc.</ref> | ||
===Multiple Nedarim=== | |||
# A Neder can take effect on a preexisting Neder, Nedarim are prohibitions on the object, not on the person, unlike [[Shevuot]]. Therefore, multiple Nedarim taken on an object take effect and accordingly increase the number of prohibitions violated when the Neder is violated.<ref>Ben Ish Chai (Shanah Shniah, Re'eh 23)</ref> | |||
=== Kinui Nedarim === | === Kinui Nedarim === | ||
# The Torah's mandate enabling one to take upon himself a Neder, Korban, Shevua, or Nezirut is not limited to the perfect pronunciation of the keywords (Neder, Korban, Shevua, and Nazir). Even a mispronunciation would take effect, given it's common to pronounce the word that way by some people in the place one is taking the Neder. For example, "Konam" could legitimately substitute for "Korban" in the time and communities of the Talmud. Gross mispronunciations (Kinuiyei Kinuiyim), however, are not effective. <ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 207:1. See Beit Yosef and Rabbi Akiva Eiger ad loc.</ref> | # The Torah's mandate enabling one to take upon himself a Neder, Korban, Shevua, or Nezirut is not limited to the perfect pronunciation of the keywords (Neder, Korban, Shevua, and Nazir). Even a mispronunciation would take effect, given it's common to pronounce the word that way by some people in the place one is taking the Neder. For example, "Konam" could legitimately substitute for "Korban" in the time and communities of the Talmud. Gross mispronunciations (Kinuiyei Kinuiyim), however, are not effective.<ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 207:1. See Beit Yosef and Rabbi Akiva Eiger ad loc.</ref> | ||
# The effectiveness of usage of the above keywords also depends on one's own understanding of them. If he doesn't understand what he's saying, his statement is invalid.<ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 207:1</ref> | # The effectiveness of usage of the above keywords also depends on one's own understanding of them. If he doesn't understand what he's saying, his statement is invalid.<ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 207:1</ref> | ||
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== One Who Prohibits Himself From Another == | == One Who Prohibits Himself From Another == | ||
# Maddir means one who takes the Neder to prohibit his benefit on another, and | # "Maddir" means one who takes the Neder to prohibit his benefit on another, and "Muddar" means one who is prohibited from receiving Hanaah. | ||
# One can only prohibit his own possessions to himself or others or of other people's possessions to himself. Therefore, one cannot prohibit another person's belongings on his fellow.<ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 225:1</ref> | # One can only prohibit his own possessions to himself or others or of other people's possessions to himself. Therefore, one cannot prohibit another person's belongings on his fellow.<ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 225:1</ref> | ||
=== General Conduct === | === General Conduct === | ||
# One who takes a Neder not to speak with his friend may still write him a letter or speak to someone else in his vicinity, even if he will hear. If he's doing it intentionally, however, even if there's a third | # One who takes a Neder not to speak with his friend may still write him a letter or speak to someone else in his vicinity, even if he will hear. If he's doing it intentionally, however, even if there's a third party in between, it's not appropriate.<ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 221:10, Shach Yoreh Deah 221:54. See R' Akiva Eiger Yoreh Deah 221:13 regarding sharing secrets with a third party to tell the person he's not supposed to share with.</ref> | ||
# On a Torah level, [[Shevuot]] can take effect on intangible object, but Nedarim can only take effect on tangible ones. Although, the latter would take effect on a DeRabbanan level; therefore, one who vows not to listen to his to his friend's prayer may not do so MiDeRabbanan. However, if he prohibited himself to his friends body, specifically, at least, his mouth, in this case, the Neder would take effect on a Torah level. The same is true for another's handiwork: only by prohibiting oneself to his fellow's hands can the Neder take effect Min HaTorah.<ref>Ben Ish Chai (Shanah Shniah, Re'eh 18)</ref> | |||
=== Property === | === Property === | ||
=== Extenuating Circumstances === | === Extenuating Circumstances === | ||
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# Prohibiting one's Sefarim to his friend includes his friend's learning of the Sefarim, because they could have been rented to him and now he's benefiting from free usage, unlike by Mitzvah items.<ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 221:11, Taz Yoreh Deah 221:40, Shach Yoreh Deah 221:55</ref> | # Prohibiting one's Sefarim to his friend includes his friend's learning of the Sefarim, because they could have been rented to him and now he's benefiting from free usage, unlike by Mitzvah items.<ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 221:11, Taz Yoreh Deah 221:40, Shach Yoreh Deah 221:55</ref> | ||
=== Benefiting His Wife === | === Benefiting His Wife === | ||
# Everything that a woman gains possession of becomes her husband's possession, unless certain stipulations are made | # Everything that a woman gains possession of becomes her husband's possession, unless certain stipulations are made. One who prohibited himself to his son-in-law may give his daughter money for her own personal use, as long as he stipulates to her that it's a gift that her husband has no control over ''and'' she can do whatever general or specific action she pleases with the money. If he does not say both, even if he stipulates that the husband should have no control, his stipulation is ineffective and he causes his son-in-law to gain possession of the gift and violate the Neder.<ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 222:1</ref> Ashkenazim are stringent if the stipulation was general and not a specific action for her to do with the money.<ref>Taz Yoreh Deah 222:3, Shach Yoreh Deah 222:3</ref> | ||
# If the gift is transferred in a permissible way, then the husband may benefit from it.<ref>Taz Yoreh Deah 222:1</ref> | # If the gift is transferred in a permissible way, then the husband may benefit from it.<ref>Taz Yoreh Deah 222:1</ref> | ||
# Giving one's daughter food, not money, does not require any explicit stimulation.<ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 221:2, Beit Yosef, Taz, Shach Yoreh Deah 222:1</ref> | # Giving one's daughter food, not money, does not require any explicit stimulation.<ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 221:2, Beit Yosef, Taz, Shach Yoreh Deah 222:1</ref> | ||
