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Harchakot of Niddah: Difference between revisions
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# It is forbidden for a man and wife to switch beds when she is a niddah. However, they can switch when she is tahor and as long as he slept in his new bed once before she became a niddah he can continue to sleep there even when she's a niddah.<ref>Badei Hashulchan 195:81</ref> | # It is forbidden for a man and wife to switch beds when she is a niddah. However, they can switch when she is tahor and as long as he slept in his new bed once before she became a niddah he can continue to sleep there even when she's a niddah.<ref>Badei Hashulchan 195:81</ref> | ||
==Separate Beds== | ==Separate Beds== | ||
# The couple may not lie together in one bed, even if it is large and wide.<Ref>Gemara Shabbat 13a concludes that it is forbidden for a man and wife to sleep in the same bed when she is a niddah. Shulchan Aruch 195:6 codifies this. Taharat Yosef 3:2 agrees.</ref> Even when they are in different beds the beds must be separated.<ref>Rama YD 195:6</ref> How far apart should the beds be? According to the strict halacha it is sufficient as long as they are separated in any amount as long as the sheets and blankets don't touch, however, the poskim recommend that the beds should be separated two feet.<ref>Pitchei Teshuva 195:11 quotes the Mekor Chaim who says that the beds need to be separated by any amount. Rav Ovadia Yosef in Taharat Habayit v. 2 p. 149 agreed. Shiurei Shevet Halevi 195:6:2 quotes the Arizal as saying that the beds needs to be separated so that the sheets and blankets don't touch. In terms of the amount of space he writes that it should be at least the width of a person and preferably an amah (60cm) so that they don't come to touch and the blankets don't come to touch. Shiurei Shevet Halevi adds that the minhag is to put something in between the beds. Mishmeret Hatahara 195:87 writes that the beds should be separated the amount of a person's reach so that they don't come to touch. Badei Hashulchan 195:109 and Rabbi Willig ([http://www.yutorah.org/sidebar/lecture.cfm/877217/rabbi-mordechai-i-willig/niddah-shiur-126-harchakot-sitting-on-same-bench-taking-trip-together-separation-between-beds-singing-what-she-can-wear-in-private/ Niddah Shiur 126 (min. 45)]) agreed.</ref> | # The couple may not lie together in one bed, even if it is large and wide.<Ref>Gemara Shabbat 13a concludes that it is forbidden for a man and wife to sleep in the same bed when she is a niddah. Shulchan Aruch 195:6 codifies this. Taharat Yosef 3:2 agrees.</ref> Even when they are in different beds the beds must be separated.<ref>Rama YD 195:6, Taharat Habayit v. 2 p. 149</ref> How far apart should the beds be? According to the strict halacha it is sufficient as long as they are separated in any amount as long as the sheets and blankets don't touch, however, the poskim recommend that the beds should be separated two feet.<ref>Pitchei Teshuva 195:11 quotes the Mekor Chaim who says that the beds need to be separated by any amount. Rav Ovadia Yosef in Taharat Habayit v. 2 p. 149 agreed. Shiurei Shevet Halevi 195:6:2 quotes the Arizal as saying that the beds needs to be separated so that the sheets and blankets don't touch. In terms of the amount of space he writes that it should be at least the width of a person and preferably an amah (60cm) so that they don't come to touch and the blankets don't come to touch. Shiurei Shevet Halevi adds that the minhag is to put something in between the beds. Mishmeret Hatahara 195:87 writes that the beds should be separated the amount of a person's reach so that they don't come to touch. Badei Hashulchan 195:109 and Rabbi Willig ([http://www.yutorah.org/sidebar/lecture.cfm/877217/rabbi-mordechai-i-willig/niddah-shiur-126-harchakot-sitting-on-same-bench-taking-trip-together-separation-between-beds-singing-what-she-can-wear-in-private/ Niddah Shiur 126 (min. 45)]) agreed.</ref> | ||
# According to many poskim it is permissible for the beds to be separated even if they are attached by a headboard, however, some hold that it isn't reccomended and some hold it is forbidden unless the headboard is just next to the beds but not attached.<ref>Mishmeret Hatahara 195:87 writes that it is permissible for the beds to be attached with a headboard. Shiurei Shevet Halevi 195:6:2 writes that it isn't recommended unless they are actually detached from the headboard. Badei Hashulchan 195:107 writes that if the headboard is attached to the beds it is forbidden.</ref> | # According to many poskim it is permissible for the beds to be separated even if they are attached by a headboard, however, some hold that it isn't reccomended and some hold it is forbidden unless the headboard is just next to the beds but not attached.<ref>Mishmeret Hatahara 195:87 writes that it is permissible for the beds to be attached with a headboard. Shiurei Shevet Halevi 195:6:2 writes that it isn't recommended unless they are actually detached from the headboard. Badei Hashulchan 195:107 writes that if the headboard is attached to the beds it is forbidden.</ref> | ||
# The beds can be touching if both of them are not in bed.<Ref>Taharat Habayit v. 2 p. 155, Taharat Yosef 3:33</ref> | # The beds can be touching if both of them are not in bed.<Ref>Taharat Habayit v. 2 p. 155, Taharat Yosef 3:33</ref> | ||
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# All of these laws apply in both directions. Thus, the husband cannot make up his wife's bed, but all of the aforementioned leniencies would still apply.<ref> Taharat Yosef 3:57</ref> | # All of these laws apply in both directions. Thus, the husband cannot make up his wife's bed, but all of the aforementioned leniencies would still apply.<ref> Taharat Yosef 3:57</ref> | ||
===Pouring Water for the Husband to Wash With=== | ===Pouring Water for the Husband to Wash With=== | ||
# A woman may not pour water on her husband so he can wash his hands, feet, and face even if she is careful not to touch her husband since this expresses affection. <ref> Taharat Yosef 3:59</ref> | # A woman may not pour water on her husband so he can wash his hands, feet, and face even if she is careful not to touch her husband since this expresses affection. <ref>Taharat Yosef 3:59. The Gemara Ketubot 61a explains that a niddah can not wash her husband's hands, feet, or face. The Rashba Ketubot 61a adds that it is forbidden even for her to pour the water and him to wash himself since the gemara wouldn't need to say that it is forbidden for her to touch him even in a non-affectionate way.</ref> | ||
# Some poskim hold that it is permitted for a woman to fill a bath for her husband but it is better for her to do so not in his presence. Others forbid this.<ref>The Rashba Ketubot 61a and Taharat Habayit 4a holds that it is only forbidden to pour water on her husband. However, Rabbenu Yonah (Igeret Hateshuva n. 75) forbids even filling a container of water for him to use to wash himself. Shach 195:14 agrees with Rabbenu Yonah. Taz 195:8 argues. Taharat Habayit v. 2 p. 199 accepts the Rashba and Taz and therefore permits preparing a bath for him but adds that it is better to do so not in his presence. Shevet Halevi 2:100 who forbids preparing a bath for him even according to the Taz since there's an element of endearment (chibah).</ref> | |||
# There is no prohibition for a woman to prepare water for her husband to wash his hand for netilat yedayim.<ref> Taharat Yosef 3:60</ref> | # There is no prohibition for a woman to prepare water for her husband to wash his hand for netilat yedayim.<ref> Taharat Yosef 3:60</ref> | ||
# All of these laws apply in both directions. Thus, the husband cannot prepare water for her to use for washing her hands, feet, and face, but all of the aforementioned leniencies would still apply.<ref> Taharat Yosef 3:61</ref> | |||
==A Niddah Going to Shul and Cemeteries== | ==A Niddah Going to Shul and Cemeteries== | ||
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==Sources== | ==Sources== | ||
<references/> | <references/> | ||
[[Category:Niddah]] | |||
