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Harchakot of Niddah: Difference between revisions

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'''Harchakot''' (Hebrew: הרחקות, tran. ''separations'') are Rabbinic supplementary restrictions intended to prevent a couple from excessive intimacy which could lead to the grave Biblical forbidden actions during the niddah period. Since couples have a certain level of familiarity, routine, and habitual rapport, the Sages with their psychological understanding and insight concluded the need for these additional restrictions. Accordingly, these precautions do not apply to one who interacts with women with whom he many not invariably touch.<ref>Shabbat 13a, Responsa Rosh (no. 47), Responsa Rashba (vol. 1, no. 1188). See however Rama (Even HaEzer 21:5) for miscellaneous laws of distance one must practice when interacting with women. </ref>  
'''Harchakot''' (Hebrew: הרחקות, tran. ''separations'') are Rabbinic supplementary restrictions intended to prevent a couple from excessive intimacy which could lead to gravely forbidden Biblical actions during the niddah period. Since couples have a certain level of familiarity, routine, and habitual rapport, the Sages with their psychological understanding and insight saw the need for these additional restrictions. Accordingly, these precautions only apply to married couples, not to interactions with women with whom a man invariably may not touch.<ref>Shabbat 13a, Responsa Rosh (no. 47), Responsa Rashba (vol. 1, no. 1188). See however Rama (Even HaEzer 21:5) for miscellaneous laws of distance one must practice when interacting with women. </ref>  


These precautions start with when a woman menstruates and extends all the way until she completes her purification process with immersion.<ref>Shulchan Aruch and Rama (Yorei Deah 195:1), Torat HaTaharah (p. 95), Taharat Yosef (3:1) </ref> This prohibition remains even if a woman reached menopause, when she no longer experiences menstrual cycles, and in the past has not followed the requisite steps to purification; she must unfetter herself with a count of hefsek taharah, seven clean days, and immersion.<ref>Torat HaTaharah p. 95, Taharat Yosef 3:2.  
These precautions commence with a woman's menstruation and extends all the way until the culmination of her purification process, immersion.<ref>Shulchan Aruch and Rama (Yorei Deah 195:1), Torat HaTaharah (p. 95), Taharat Yosef (3:1) </ref> This prohibition remains even if a woman reached menopause, when she no longer experiences menstrual cycles, and in the past has not followed the requisite steps to purification; she must unfetter herself with a count of hefsek taharah, seven clean days, and immersion.<ref>Torat HaTaharah p. 95, Taharat Yosef 3:2.  


*Tosfot Shabbat 13b (s.v. biymey) point out that from Rashi (Ketubot 61a s.v. michalfa) it appears like there would have been leniencies of harchakot when a woman was counting her shiva nekiyim after she stopping seeing blood. Rabbenu Chananel (Ketubot 61a) also seems to hold like rashi. Tosfot argue that this is incorrect since until the woman completed her shiva nekiyim and went to mikveh she is equally forbidden to her husband with a penalty of karet. The Rashba ([http://www.hebrewbooks.org/pdfpager.aspx?req=8922&st=&pgnum=345 Torat Habayit 4a]), Raavad ([http://www.hebrewbooks.org/pdfpager.aspx?req=8785&st=&pgnum=8 Baalei Hanefesh p. 10]), Rosh (Ketubot 5:24), and Rambam (Isurei Biyah 11:18) hold that really there is no difference between a women when she is seeing blood and when she is in her shiva nekiyim.              (See Rashba who argues that Rabbenu Chananel only meant if she went to mikveh twice. See the Rivash 425 and Ramban Shabbat 13b who forbid this practice of going to mikveh twice.)</ref>
*Tosfot Shabbat 13b (s.v. biymey) point out that from Rashi (Ketubot 61a s.v. michalfa) it appears like there would have been leniencies of harchakot when a woman was counting her shiva nekiyim after she stopping seeing blood. Rabbenu Chananel (Ketubot 61a) also seems to hold like rashi. Tosfot argue that this is incorrect since until the woman completed her shiva nekiyim and went to mikveh she is equally forbidden to her husband with a penalty of karet. The Rashba ([http://www.hebrewbooks.org/pdfpager.aspx?req=8922&st=&pgnum=345 Torat Habayit 4a]), Raavad ([http://www.hebrewbooks.org/pdfpager.aspx?req=8785&st=&pgnum=8 Baalei Hanefesh p. 10]), Rosh (Ketubot 5:24), and Rambam (Isurei Biyah 11:18) hold that really there is no difference between a women when she is seeing blood and when she is in her shiva nekiyim.              (See Rashba who argues that Rabbenu Chananel only meant if she went to mikveh twice. See the Rivash 425 and Ramban Shabbat 13b who forbid this practice of going to mikveh twice.)</ref>
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==Touching==
==Touching==


#Physical affection of any form is prohibited to the couple during the niddah period. Most authorities maintain that this prohibition is Biblical. To safeguard this sin, the Rabbis prohibited any form of physical contact even infinitesimal and unaffectionate touch.<ref>Shabbat 13b relating an incident of a righteous man who died prematurely due to his laxity in adhering to the Rabbis enactments  indicates that even ephemeral touch is prohibited.  
#Physical affection of any form is prohibited to a couple during the women's niddah period. To safeguard this sin, the Rabbis prohibited any form of physical contact, even of infinitesimal and unaffectionate touch.<ref>Shabbat 13b relating an incident of a righteous man who died prematurely due to his laxity in adhering to the Rabbis enactments  indicates that even ephemeral touch is prohibited.  
See the Ravyah (Niddah no. 173) and Or Zaruah (1:360) who permit non-affectionate touch. All other Rishonim reject this opinion. This includes, Tosfot (Shabbat 13b s.v. biymey), Ramban (Hilchot Niddah 8:3), Rashba ([http://www.hebrewbooks.org/pdfpager.aspx?req=9381&st=&pgnum=347 Torat Habayit Hakatzar 4a]), and Rambam (Isurei Biyah 11:18). Following them, Shulchan Aruch (Yoreh Deah 195:2) prohibits any touch, even when not done for pleasure.  </ref>
See the Ravyah (Niddah no. 173) and Or Zaruah (1:360) who permit non-affectionate touch. All other Rishonim reject this opinion. This includes, Tosfot (Shabbat 13b s.v. biymey), Ramban (Hilchot Niddah 8:3), Rashba ([http://www.hebrewbooks.org/pdfpager.aspx?req=9381&st=&pgnum=347 Torat Habayit Hakatzar 4a]), and Rambam (Isurei Biyah 11:18). Following them, Shulchan Aruch (Yoreh Deah 195:2) prohibits any touch, even when not done for pleasure.  </ref>
#He may not even touch her clothing, nor she his, even if the clothing hangs loosely off the body and the person will not feel the touch. They should be also be careful that the clothing of one does not touch the clothing of the other.<ref>Aruch Hashulchan 195:5, Badei Hashulchan 195:15, Torat HaTaharah p. 97, Taharat Yosef 4:5</ref>
#Moreover, the couple must refrain from touching the others outfit that is being worn (e.g., one spouse cannot remove dirt off the other's coat while he/she is wearing it). This is prohibited even if the other can not feel the touch. Additionally, they should even avoid their outfits from touching. This restriction applies only to garments being worn, one may touch clothing not currently worn.<ref>Rashbatz (Responsa Tashbetz, vol. 3, no. 58), Pitchei Teshuva (Yoreh Deah 195:3), Darchei Tahara (pg. 41), Taharat Habayit (vol. 2, pg. 86) </ref>
#A husband and wife are permitted to touch each other's clothing when the wife is a niddah while the clothes are not being worn by the spouse.<ref>Torat HaTaharah p. 97-98, Taharat Yosef 4:5</ref> Similarly they are allowed to touch each other's bedding while their spouse is not lying on it. This applies even if the clothes or sheets are stained. A man is also permitted to remove his wife's sheet from her bed and put it on his own bed, even if the sheet is stained, as long as the sheet is not designated specifically for her use.<ref>Torat HaTaharah p. 97-98</ref>


==Intimate Speech==
==Intimate Speech==
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