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Hafarat Nedarim: Difference between revisions
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yom shomo hafarah and kiyum balev and hatarah without the husband 234:20-23
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= Stages of Marriage = | = Stages of Marriage = | ||
== How to Revoke (Meifer) or Uphold (Meikim) a Neder == | |||
# Even if the one upholds the Neder, if the woman goes to a Beit Din for Hatarat Nedarim and gets it annulled, the Hatarah works,<ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 234:23</ref> though some are stringent and only allow such when he remained silent, not when he upheld the Neder.<ref>Rama ibid admits the former opinion is correct but opts to be stringent for the latter opinion. Taz Yoreh Deah 234:26 explains that this is based on כל אשה על דעת בעלה היא נודרת, and the Shach Yoreh Deah 234:37 adds that certainly if the husband didn't hear of the Neder one can be lenient. If it's past the day he heard of it, then the Shach (Yoreh Deah 234:38-39) recommends he should first annul his upholding of the Neder, then revoke her Neder, and then she should go to Beit Din unless he's not available, in which case, one can rely on the first opinion and just let her get it annulled.</ref> | |||
=== Yom Shomo === | |||
# A Neder may only be revoked on the day it was heard of (Yom Shomo) until Shekiah.<ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 234:21</reF> | |||
# If the one in position of revoking the Neder remains silent (Shetikah) until the day is over, then the Neder is considered upheld and can no longer be revoked. Therefore, if he decides to tease her by being silent until Shekiah, the opportunity is lost. However, if he didn't realize that he is in the position to revoke the Neder or he thought that the Neder at hand is not of the type that can be revoked by him, then it can still be revoked for the entire day that he gains full clarity of the situation.<ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 234:21</ref> At the same time, if he ''knew'' he could revoke it but didn't know it had to be ''on the same day'', then once the day passes, he's lost his chance.<ref>Taz Yoreh Dea 234:25</ref> | |||
# If he's silent with intention to uphold it right away, then the mental upholding of the Neder takes effect, and he cannot revoke it any longer.<ref>Shach Yoreh Deah 234:35, see Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 234:41</ref> | |||
# One who responded to his wife's informing him that she took a Neder with a language that he was unaware meant he's upholding it cannot effectively revoke it later that day, even if he did already, unless he requests to annul the upholding. Then, retroactively, his revoking will be effective.<ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 234:22</ref> | |||
== Prior to Kiddushin/Erusin == | == Prior to Kiddushin/Erusin == | ||
# The Torah gives license to a man to revoke the Nedarim of his young daughter and those of his wife. This action is known as "Hafarah." A father can only revoke his daughter's Nedarim while she is a Ketana (below the age of twelve) or Na'arah (between twelve with Simanim and twelve and a half). Once she becomes a Bogeret (twelve and a half with Simanim) or reaches Nissuin, he may no longer revoke her Nedarim.<ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 234:1</ref> | # The Torah gives license to a man to revoke the Nedarim of his young daughter and those of his wife. This action is known as "Hafarah." A father can only revoke his daughter's Nedarim while she is a Ketana (below the age of twelve) or Na'arah (between twelve with Simanim and twelve and a half). Once she becomes a Bogeret (twelve and a half with Simanim) or reaches Nissuin, he may no longer revoke her Nedarim.<ref>Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 234:1</ref> | ||
