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Proper Conduct of a Meal: Difference between revisions
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# Some rely on recital of the mizmor of tehillim of Al Naharot Bavel or [[Shir HaMaalot]] BeShuv even though it's preferable to actually say Divrei Torah during the meal. <Ref>Aruch HaShulchan 170:1 </ref> | # Some rely on recital of the mizmor of tehillim of Al Naharot Bavel or [[Shir HaMaalot]] BeShuv even though it's preferable to actually say Divrei Torah during the meal. <Ref>Aruch HaShulchan 170:1 </ref> | ||
# Some say that saying "[[Mayim Achronim]] Chovah" counts as divrei torah at the meal. <ref> Ben Ish Chai (Shelach #7), Shulchan Aruch HaMekusar (pg 245 note 12), Halacha Brurah 170:2 </ref> | # Some say that saying "[[Mayim Achronim]] Chovah" counts as divrei torah at the meal. <ref> Ben Ish Chai (Shelach #7), Shulchan Aruch HaMekusar (pg 245 note 12), Halacha Brurah 170:2 </ref> | ||
# There's a minority opinion that one fulfills one's obligation by saying [[Birkat | # There's a minority opinion that one fulfills one's obligation by saying [[Birkat HaMazon]]. <ref> Rav Ovadyah MeBartenura on Avot 3:3 writes that one fulfills this obligation by [[saying Birkat HaMazon]]. Mishna Brurah 170:1 and Rivovot Efraim 1:134 do not accept this as halacha. [Anaf Etz Avot (Rav Ovadyah Yosef, 3:3, pg 176) defends the Bartenuro from the question of the Tosfot [[Yom Tov]] (who asked why would the mishna be dealing with Reshayim who don't say [[Birkat HaMazon]]). However, Anaf Etz Avot isn't one of Rav Ovadyah's halachic works and this may be just what he would suggest in learning.] </ref> | ||
==Talking during the meal== | ==Talking during the meal== | ||
# It is forbidden to talk during the meal, however, between courses it's permitted to talk. However, the Minhag HaOlam (custom of the world) is to be lenient and allow talking during the meal. <ref>S"A 170:1 rules that it's forbidden to talk during the meal. Mishna Brurah 170:1 writes that it's only forbidden during the actual meal but not between courses. Halacha Brurah 170:1 agrees. The Perisha writes that perhaps this was only a concern in the days of the Talmud when they ate while leaning, but nowadays that people sit up while eating it's permitted but concludes that no one writes such a distinction. The Pri Megadim (A"A 170:1) writes that it seems that most poskim don't hold of the Perisha. Nonetheless, the Aruch HaShulchan 170:2 writes that the minhag is to allow talking during the meal and defends the minhag because of Shomer Petaim Hashem (Hashem protects the innocent from danger). Yalkut Yosef (vol 3, p 139) and Halacha Brurah 170:1 also write that the minhag is to be lenient about this. </ref> | # It is forbidden to talk during the meal, however, between courses it's permitted to talk. However, the Minhag HaOlam (custom of the world) is to be lenient and allow talking during the meal. <ref>S"A 170:1 rules that it's forbidden to talk during the meal. Mishna Brurah 170:1 writes that it's only forbidden during the actual meal but not between courses. Halacha Brurah 170:1 agrees. The Perisha writes that perhaps this was only a concern in the days of the Talmud when they ate while leaning, but nowadays that people sit up while eating it's permitted but concludes that no one writes such a distinction. The Pri Megadim (A"A 170:1) writes that it seems that most poskim don't hold of the Perisha. Nonetheless, the Aruch HaShulchan 170:2 writes that the minhag is to allow talking during the meal and defends the minhag because of Shomer Petaim Hashem (Hashem protects the innocent from danger). Yalkut Yosef (vol 3, p 139) and Halacha Brurah 170:1 also write that the minhag is to be lenient about this. </ref> | ||
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# The Minhag HaOlam is to drink in front of other people, whether its in a meal or outside of a meal, whether its water or another drink.<Ref>Halacha Brurah 170:7 writes that the Minhag HaOlam is to drink in front of other people whether its in a meal or outside a meal, whether its water or another drink. See Kitzur S"A 42:12 who quotes this halacha of turning away one's face when drinking water.</ref> | # The Minhag HaOlam is to drink in front of other people, whether its in a meal or outside of a meal, whether its water or another drink.<Ref>Halacha Brurah 170:7 writes that the Minhag HaOlam is to drink in front of other people whether its in a meal or outside a meal, whether its water or another drink. See Kitzur S"A 42:12 who quotes this halacha of turning away one's face when drinking water.</ref> | ||
# At the end of the meal, it is proper to leave a small quantity of food on one's plate so as not to look like a glutton. <ref> Halacha Berura 170:9 </ref> | # At the end of the meal, it is proper to leave a small quantity of food on one's plate so as not to look like a glutton. <ref> Halacha Berura 170:9 </ref> | ||
# One should neither stare at his/her portion of food nor the portion of food used for serving. <ref> Halacha Berura 170:10 </ref> The same conduct applies with regard to drinks. <ref> Halacha Berura 170:10 </ref> | |||
==Feeding others before you eat== | ==Feeding others before you eat== | ||
# One who has animal whom he has to feed shouldn't eat until he feed his animal. However, when it comes to drinks, one person can drink before he gives to his animals.<reF>Kitzur S"A 42:1</ref> | # One who has animal whom he has to feed shouldn't eat until he feed his animal. However, when it comes to drinks, one person can drink before he gives to his animals.<reF>Kitzur S"A 42:1</ref> | ||
==Sources== | ==Sources== | ||
<references/> | <references/> | ||
