Complimenting Non-Jews: Difference between revisions

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#One is forbidden to give a compliment to a non-Jew or to his actions.<ref>Avoda Zara 20b quoting Devarim 7:2. Rambam Hilchos Avodas Kochavim 10:4. Shulchan Aruch Y.D. 151:14</ref> One is forbidden to bless a non-Jew.<ref>Magen Avraham O.C. 189:1 says that when there is a non-Jew in the house, one must change the text of the Harachaman in Birkat HaMazon to kulanu yachad benay bris. The Taz says to say kulanu benay bris yachad</ref>
#One is forbidden to give a compliment to an ''akum'' or to his actions.<ref>Avoda Zara 20b quoting Devarim 7:2. Rambam Hilchos Avodas Kochavim 10:4. Shulchan Aruch Y.D. 151:14.
##Some explain that this by all non-Jews except for a ''ger toshav''.<ref>Tosfos Avoda Zara 20a s.v. d'amar. Beis Yosef C.M. 249. Shach Y.D. 151:18.
 
Rav Moshe Feinstein (Igros Moshe O.C. 2:51) says this is specifically by ''akum''s, but does not apply to irreligious Jews. </ref> One is forbidden to bless an ''akum''.<ref>Magen Avraham O.C. 189:1 says that when there is an ''akum'' in the house, one must change the text of the Harachaman in Birkat HaMazon to kulanu yachad benay bris. The Taz says to say kulanu benay bris yachad</ref>
##Some explain that this by all ''akum''s except for a ''ger toshav''.<ref>Tosfos Avoda Zara 20a s.v. d'amar. Beis Yosef C.M. 249. Shach Y.D. 151:18.


Sma C.M. 249:2 explains that a ger toshav is a person who accepts the sheva mitzvos bnei noach and we are therefore obligated to provide for him if he doesn't have and are allowed to give him gifts. However, one who doesn't abide by the sheva mitzvos can only be sold to</ref>
Sma C.M. 249:2 explains that a ger toshav is a person who accepts the sheva mitzvos bnei noach and we are therefore obligated to provide for him if he doesn't have and are allowed to give him gifts. However, one who doesn't abide by the sheva mitzvos can only be sold to</ref>
##Others explain that this only applies to idolaters<ref>Meiri Avoda Zara 20a, Shut HaRashba 1:8, and Sefer HaChinuch Mitzvah 426</ref>
##Others explain that this only applies to idolaters<ref>Meiri Avoda Zara 20a, Shut HaRashba 1:8, and Sefer HaChinuch Mitzvah 426. Rav Ovadia Yosef (Yalkut Yosef Kitzur Shulchan Aruch O.C. 328 and Yabia Omer Y.D. 10:41 expands this to any law abiding ''akum'' who believes in God). Shut Titz Eliezer 15:47:5</ref>
##Others explain that this only applied to the seven nations that inhabited the land of Israel in the days of Yehoshua.<ref>Torah Temimah in Devarim 7:2</ref>
##Others explain that this only applied to the seven nations that inhabited the land of Israel in the days of Yehoshua.<ref>Torah Temimah in Devarim 7:2. Titz Eliezer 15:47 says this is not accepted as it is against the rishonim</ref>
#The prohibition is about the complimenting, not about the non-Jew benefiting. Therefore, it applies even if the non-Jew does not receive benefit.<ref>Avoda Berura Avoda Zara 20</ref>
#The prohibition is about the complimenting, not about the ''akum'' benefiting. Therefore, it applies even if the ''akum'' does not receive benefit.<ref>Avoda Berura Avoda Zara 20
 
Sefer HaChinuch 426 explains the reason for the prohibition is because by praising them, you’ll feel closer to them, and come to assimilate. The Sefer Charedim Mitzvos Lo Saseh 1:33 says therefore the prohibition primarily depends on your thoughts and emotions.</ref>
#The prohibition is only to express the praise, but thinking it is permissible.<ref>Titz Eliezer 15:47 quoting from Rav Shalom Shulal (Sefer Naveh Shalom 24). However, he notes that some argue, so it is appropriate to be strict.</ref>
#Some permit praising an ''akum'' if you don't really feel that way.<ref>Titz Eliezer 15:47 quoting from Rav Shalom Shulal (Sefer Naveh Shalom 24)</ref>


==Exceptions==
==Exceptions==


#If you have a relationship with the non-Jew and may receive something in return, one is permitted to give gifts.<ref>Taz Y.D. 151:8. Rosh Avoda Zara 1:19 explains that it is not a free gift, but an exchange, similar to a sale.</ref>
#It is permissible to praise an ''akum'' as a form of praise of God.<ref>Shulchan Aruch Y.D. 151:14. Shut Btzel HaChochma 1:46. Shut Titz Eliezer 15:47:4</ref>
#It is permitted to give a gift for an ulterior motive.<ref>Ran (Gittin 38b) uses this rationale to explain how Rabbi Eliezer freed his slave in order to complete a minyan. Although this was a gift to the slave, it is permissible if the givers benefit. Shut HaRashbash 468 says it would be prohibited to give a vessel to a non-Jew as a present on Yom Tov if you forgot to do tevilas keilim.</ref>
#It is permissible to praise an ''akum'' as a springboard to praising a Jew.<ref>Sefer HaChinuch Mitzvah 426. Shut Titz Eliezer 15:47:3. Shut Teshuvos V'Hanhagos 4:197 recommends adding this if you praise an ''akum''</ref>
#It is permissible to praise a non-Jew as a form of praise of God.<ref>Shulchan Aruch Y.D. 151:14. Shut Btzel HaChochma 1:46</ref>
#One may praise an ''akum'' for good deeds he did for a Jew.<ref>Sefer Chasidim 746 uses this to explain how we can say Charvona Zachur LaTov on Purim after the Megillah reading</ref> One may also pray for such a person.<ref>Sefer HaChasidim 790. See Rav Chaim Palagi (Shut Chaim BiYad Siman 33) where he brings a proof from Elisha curing Naaman
#It is permissible to praise a non-Jew as a springboard to praising a Jew.<ref>Sefer HaChinuch Mitzvah 426</ref>
 
#One may praise a non-Jew for good deeds he did for a Jew.<ref>Sefer Chasidim 746 uses this to explain how we can say Charvona Zachur LaTov on Purim after the Megillah reading</ref> One may also pray for such a person.<ref>Sefer HaChasidim 790</ref>
Rav Yitzchak Atiah (Rov Dagan Kuntres Os L'Tovah 45) quoted by Rav Ovadia Yosef (Yechaveh Daas 6:60)  says that if you don't know the ''akum'', you may pray that they return to do the proper thing and feel better.</ref>
#One may pray and say kaddish for a non Jewish parent.<ref>Rav Ovadia Yosef (Yechaveh Daas 6:60)</ref>
#One should pray and say kaddish for a non Jewish parent.<ref>Rav Ovadia Yosef (Yechaveh Daas 6:60)</ref>
#Some allow praising the wisdom of a non-Jew.<ref>Shut Teshuvos V'Hanhagos 4:197 bases this on the idea of Medrash Eicha Rabah 2:13 that we should believe that the nations of the world have wisdom. This also explains how the Rambam would compliment Aristotle's wisdom. However, it is always advisable to use the praise as a springboard for the Jews by adding "but not as smart as our sages."</ref>
#Some only praising an individual ''akum'', but allow praising a nation.<ref>Titz Eliezer 15:47 quoting from Rav Chaim Palagi (Nishmas Kol Chai 1:54)</ref> Others prohibit this as well.<ref>Titz Eliezer 15:47 quoting from the Gra Gemorah Shabbos 33b. Rav Menashe Klein (Shut Mishna Halachot 10:111) says that one cannot call his food after a country (i.e. Chinese food) as this is a form of praise</ref>
#Some allow praising a non-Jew if there is no personal connection.<ref>Shut Teshuvos V'Hanhagos 4:197</ref>
#Some only prohibit praising something that is uniquely not Jewish, but if it relates to the Torah it is permissible.<ref>Shut Titz Eliezer 15:47 quoting from Rav Chaim Palagi (Nishmas Kol Chai 1:54). The Titz Eliezer concludes that therefore we should praise those who have a medical breakthrough.</ref>
#Some allow praising a non-Jew after he dies.<ref>Avoda Berurah Avoda Zara 20 as we no longer have to worry about becoming to involved with the non-Jew.</ref>
#Some allow praising the wisdom of an ''akum''.<ref>Shut Teshuvos V'Hanhagos 4:197 bases this on the idea of Medrash Eicha Rabah 2:13 that we should believe that the nations of the world have wisdom. This also explains how the Rambam would compliment Aristotle's wisdom. However, it is always advisable to use the praise as a springboard for the Jews by adding "but not as smart as our sages."</ref>
#Some only prohibit praising a non-Jew with above normal abilities.<ref>Shut Divrei Yatziv 10:43</ref>
#Some allow praising an ''akum'' if there is no personal connection.<ref>Shut Teshuvos V'Hanhagos 4:197 as you will not come closer to him</ref>
#Some allow praising an ''akum'' after he dies.<ref>Avoda Berurah Avoda Zara 20 as we no longer have to worry about becoming to involved with the ''akum''.</ref>
#Some only prohibit praising an ''akum'' with above normal abilities.<ref>Shut Divrei Yatziv 10:43</ref>
#Some allow complementing an ''akum'' if you have an ulterior motive.<ref>Rabbi Pinchas Zvichi (Shut Ateret Paz E.H. 1:3:5) allows one to put up a sign lilu nishmot soldiers of the Israeli army including an ''akum''. He adds that there is also an additional concern of maintaining peace.
 
On the other hand, Rabbi Amram Bloom (Shut Beit Shearim Y.D. 227) says one shouldn't facilitate a relationship between ''akum''s even though he will be making money as he will likely come to praise them.</ref>


==Links==
==Links==
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==Sources==
==Sources==
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[[Category:Interactions with Non-Jews]]
[[Category:Interactions with ''akum''s]]

Latest revision as of 22:01, 4 March 2020

Source

  1. One is forbidden to give a compliment to an akum or to his actions.[1] One is forbidden to bless an akum.[2]
    1. Some explain that this by all akums except for a ger toshav.[3]
    2. Others explain that this only applies to idolaters[4]
    3. Others explain that this only applied to the seven nations that inhabited the land of Israel in the days of Yehoshua.[5]
  2. The prohibition is about the complimenting, not about the akum benefiting. Therefore, it applies even if the akum does not receive benefit.[6]
  3. The prohibition is only to express the praise, but thinking it is permissible.[7]
  4. Some permit praising an akum if you don't really feel that way.[8]

Exceptions

  1. It is permissible to praise an akum as a form of praise of God.[9]
  2. It is permissible to praise an akum as a springboard to praising a Jew.[10]
  3. One may praise an akum for good deeds he did for a Jew.[11] One may also pray for such a person.[12]
  4. One should pray and say kaddish for a non Jewish parent.[13]
  5. Some only praising an individual akum, but allow praising a nation.[14] Others prohibit this as well.[15]
  6. Some only prohibit praising something that is uniquely not Jewish, but if it relates to the Torah it is permissible.[16]
  7. Some allow praising the wisdom of an akum.[17]
  8. Some allow praising an akum if there is no personal connection.[18]
  9. Some allow praising an akum after he dies.[19]
  10. Some only prohibit praising an akum with above normal abilities.[20]
  11. Some allow complementing an akum if you have an ulterior motive.[21]

Links

  1. Rabbi Aryeh Lebowitz - Lo Sechaneim - Gifts and Compliments to Gentiles
  2. Rabbi Chaim Goldberg - Bein Yisroel L'Nochri Siman 28 page 394

Sources

  1. ↑ Avoda Zara 20b quoting Devarim 7:2. Rambam Hilchos Avodas Kochavim 10:4. Shulchan Aruch Y.D. 151:14. Rav Moshe Feinstein (Igros Moshe O.C. 2:51) says this is specifically by akums, but does not apply to irreligious Jews.
  2. ↑ Magen Avraham O.C. 189:1 says that when there is an akum in the house, one must change the text of the Harachaman in Birkat HaMazon to kulanu yachad benay bris. The Taz says to say kulanu benay bris yachad
  3. ↑ Tosfos Avoda Zara 20a s.v. d'amar. Beis Yosef C.M. 249. Shach Y.D. 151:18. Sma C.M. 249:2 explains that a ger toshav is a person who accepts the sheva mitzvos bnei noach and we are therefore obligated to provide for him if he doesn't have and are allowed to give him gifts. However, one who doesn't abide by the sheva mitzvos can only be sold to
  4. ↑ Meiri Avoda Zara 20a, Shut HaRashba 1:8, and Sefer HaChinuch Mitzvah 426. Rav Ovadia Yosef (Yalkut Yosef Kitzur Shulchan Aruch O.C. 328 and Yabia Omer Y.D. 10:41 expands this to any law abiding akum who believes in God). Shut Titz Eliezer 15:47:5
  5. ↑ Torah Temimah in Devarim 7:2. Titz Eliezer 15:47 says this is not accepted as it is against the rishonim
  6. ↑ Avoda Berura Avoda Zara 20 Sefer HaChinuch 426 explains the reason for the prohibition is because by praising them, you’ll feel closer to them, and come to assimilate. The Sefer Charedim Mitzvos Lo Saseh 1:33 says therefore the prohibition primarily depends on your thoughts and emotions.
  7. ↑ Titz Eliezer 15:47 quoting from Rav Shalom Shulal (Sefer Naveh Shalom 24). However, he notes that some argue, so it is appropriate to be strict.
  8. ↑ Titz Eliezer 15:47 quoting from Rav Shalom Shulal (Sefer Naveh Shalom 24)
  9. ↑ Shulchan Aruch Y.D. 151:14. Shut Btzel HaChochma 1:46. Shut Titz Eliezer 15:47:4
  10. ↑ Sefer HaChinuch Mitzvah 426. Shut Titz Eliezer 15:47:3. Shut Teshuvos V'Hanhagos 4:197 recommends adding this if you praise an akum
  11. ↑ Sefer Chasidim 746 uses this to explain how we can say Charvona Zachur LaTov on Purim after the Megillah reading
  12. ↑ Sefer HaChasidim 790. See Rav Chaim Palagi (Shut Chaim BiYad Siman 33) where he brings a proof from Elisha curing Naaman Rav Yitzchak Atiah (Rov Dagan Kuntres Os L'Tovah 45) quoted by Rav Ovadia Yosef (Yechaveh Daas 6:60) says that if you don't know the akum, you may pray that they return to do the proper thing and feel better.
  13. ↑ Rav Ovadia Yosef (Yechaveh Daas 6:60)
  14. ↑ Titz Eliezer 15:47 quoting from Rav Chaim Palagi (Nishmas Kol Chai 1:54)
  15. ↑ Titz Eliezer 15:47 quoting from the Gra Gemorah Shabbos 33b. Rav Menashe Klein (Shut Mishna Halachot 10:111) says that one cannot call his food after a country (i.e. Chinese food) as this is a form of praise
  16. ↑ Shut Titz Eliezer 15:47 quoting from Rav Chaim Palagi (Nishmas Kol Chai 1:54). The Titz Eliezer concludes that therefore we should praise those who have a medical breakthrough.
  17. ↑ Shut Teshuvos V'Hanhagos 4:197 bases this on the idea of Medrash Eicha Rabah 2:13 that we should believe that the nations of the world have wisdom. This also explains how the Rambam would compliment Aristotle's wisdom. However, it is always advisable to use the praise as a springboard for the Jews by adding "but not as smart as our sages."
  18. ↑ Shut Teshuvos V'Hanhagos 4:197 as you will not come closer to him
  19. ↑ Avoda Berurah Avoda Zara 20 as we no longer have to worry about becoming to involved with the akum.
  20. ↑ Shut Divrei Yatziv 10:43
  21. ↑ Rabbi Pinchas Zvichi (Shut Ateret Paz E.H. 1:3:5) allows one to put up a sign lilu nishmot soldiers of the Israeli army including an akum. He adds that there is also an additional concern of maintaining peace. On the other hand, Rabbi Amram Bloom (Shut Beit Shearim Y.D. 227) says one shouldn't facilitate a relationship between akums even though he will be making money as he will likely come to praise them.
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