Sheva Brachot: Difference between revisions

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The phrase “Sheva Brachos” refers to the set of blessings, usually seven ("sheva") in total (see below), recited in conjunction with the marriage ceremony and at a meal eaten in honor of the new couple during the first week of their marriage. Colloquially, this term is also used to refer to the meal at which these brachos will be recited. Technically, only six of these blessings are actually unique to the marriage celebration, as the ‘seventh’ bracha is the “Hagafen” made on a cup of wine. The text of the brachos can be found in most siddurim and “bentchers” immediately after Birkas HaMazon. see also [http://www.chabad.org/library/article_cdo/aid/479965/jewish/Text-of-Sheva-Brachot.htm Text of Sheva Brachot] on Chabad.org. In some circumstances (see below), only “Hagafen” and “Asher Bara” are recited.
==General Laws==
# The couple traditionally honors attendees with appointing them to recite the Sheva Brachos. Because these blessings are meant especially for the (bride and) groom, it is better that the groom himself not recite them<ref>Teshuvah of Rabbi Avraham ben haRambam quoted in Maaseh Rokeach on Hilchos Ishus, referenced by Otzar Haposkim E.H. 62:1:8. See also Rama 34:1, Semag Aseh 48, Mordechai Kesuvos 131, Hagahos Maimoni Ishus 10:3, and Drisha to Tur E.H. 34:1 who add that the groom should not make the blessings so as not to embarrass a groom who wouldn’t be able to recite them himself.</ref> and for the person reciting the blessings to face the couple.<ref>Maharil (Hilchos Nisuin) would face the bride and groom specifically for the blessing of “Sameach Tisamach,” and common practice is to do so for all of the brachos (see Shulchan Ha’Ezer 2:42). The Aruch Hashulchan (62:9) writes that ideally, the bride and groom should face East, and the person reciting the brachos should face West.</ref> However, if nobody else present is able to say the brachos, the groom may do so.<ref>Mordechai Kesuvos 131, Shut Maharsham 1:160, Sdei Chemed “Chasan V’Kallah” 18, all quoted in Otzar Haposkim 62:1:10.</ref>
# Many believe that the same person must recite all of the brachos,<ref>Shaarei Efraim on Hilchos Keriyas haTorah Shaar 9 Pischei Shearim 19, Shut Har Tzvi O.C. 44, cf. Pischei Teshuvos 61:17 that one person recites all of the blessings appears to be implied strongly by all of the Rishonim who discuss these brachos, especially considering that the brachos are considered smuchim to each other.</ref> but the near-universal practice is to permit dividing the brachos among various people, especially because there are usually several people who the family wants to honor.<ref>See Igros Moseh E.H. 1:94, Tzitz Eliezer 6:2:5, Yabia Omer 4:7, and Mishneh Halachos 4:204 who all defend this practice, although none of these poskim appear to be so encouraging of the custom. Rav Moshe Feinstein notes that all those reciting the brachos should still make sure to listen and say amen to all of the others. See Otzar Haposkim 62:3:4 and Shut Bnei Banim 4:6 for further discussion of splitting the brachos generally as well as grouping various brachos together, such as the first two or the first six.</ref>
# The order of the brachos is not essential, meaning that if one made a mistake and skipped a bracha, he should recite the bracha that was skipped.<ref>Be’er Heitiv 62:3 quoting Rambam in Shut Pe’er Hador 9. Nitei Gavriel Nisuin 34:3 applies this to the bracha of “Hagafen” as well. Similarly, if there is no one who knows all of the brachos, they may still recite whatever brachos they know (Otzar Haposkim 62:3:1).</ref>


==Under The Chuppah==
==Under The Chuppah==

Revision as of 22:13, 13 July 2017

The phrase “Sheva Brachos” refers to the set of blessings, usually seven ("sheva") in total (see below), recited in conjunction with the marriage ceremony and at a meal eaten in honor of the new couple during the first week of their marriage. Colloquially, this term is also used to refer to the meal at which these brachos will be recited. Technically, only six of these blessings are actually unique to the marriage celebration, as the ‘seventh’ bracha is the “Hagafen” made on a cup of wine. The text of the brachos can be found in most siddurim and “bentchers” immediately after Birkas HaMazon. see also Text of Sheva Brachot on Chabad.org. In some circumstances (see below), only “Hagafen” and “Asher Bara” are recited.

General Laws

  1. The couple traditionally honors attendees with appointing them to recite the Sheva Brachos. Because these blessings are meant especially for the (bride and) groom, it is better that the groom himself not recite them[1] and for the person reciting the blessings to face the couple.[2] However, if nobody else present is able to say the brachos, the groom may do so.[3]
  2. Many believe that the same person must recite all of the brachos,[4] but the near-universal practice is to permit dividing the brachos among various people, especially because there are usually several people who the family wants to honor.[5]
  3. The order of the brachos is not essential, meaning that if one made a mistake and skipped a bracha, he should recite the bracha that was skipped.[6]

Under The Chuppah

  1. Some Poskim hold that everyone in the audience must stand for the Sheva Berachot recited under the Chuppah.[7]

Week after Marriage

  1. The sheva brachot are only recited at a meal in which bread is eaten and birchat hamazon is recited. [8]

Beit Chatanim

  1. According to some Sephardim, if the meals during the week after the wedding do not take place in the house of groom one may only make the bracha of hagefen and ashar bara (and not all sheva brachot). [9]

Minyan

  1. One needs a Minyan to say Birkat Chatanim, includining the Chatan.[10]
  1. If only the final bracha of “Asher Bara” will be recited (see below), only three men need to have joined the meal and be present at Birkas Hamazon.[11]
  2. Women do not count towards the Minyan for sheva brachot.[12]
  3. A minor does not count for the minyan of sheva brachot.[13]

Panim Chadashot

  1. In order to recite all 7 berachot, one must invite someone who did not attend either the wedding or a previous sheva berachot. [14] While some poskim require that the panim chadashot be given a setting, others are more lenient; the minhag is to be lenient and allow calling in a stranger or waiter to count as panim chadashot. [15]
  2. The Panim Chadashot can come even in the middle or towards the end of the meal.[16]
  3. A woman cannot count as a panim chadashot.[17]
  4. A child cannot count as panim chadashot.[18]
  5. While many poskim hold that panim chadashot means only one new person, some hold that two are required.[19]

Who Needs to Eat Bread

  1. The accepted psak is that Sheva Brachos are recited only after a meal of bread, after Birkas Hamazon[20]
  2. Ideally, at least ten of the attendees should eat bread.[21] However, many poskim allow Sheva Brachos to be said if only seven people ate bread, and some even permit Sheva Brachos to be said if only three people ate bread, as long as there is a minyan in attendance.[22] Either way, the (bride and) groom themselves should have eaten bread.[23]

Second Marriages

  1. If both the Chatan and the Kallah have been previously married, Sheva Berachot is only recited for one day.[24]

Practices During the Week after Marriage

  1. A chatan is compared to a king. Just like a king wears fancy attire, so too a chatan should wear fancy attire.[25]

Links

Sources

  1. Teshuvah of Rabbi Avraham ben haRambam quoted in Maaseh Rokeach on Hilchos Ishus, referenced by Otzar Haposkim E.H. 62:1:8. See also Rama 34:1, Semag Aseh 48, Mordechai Kesuvos 131, Hagahos Maimoni Ishus 10:3, and Drisha to Tur E.H. 34:1 who add that the groom should not make the blessings so as not to embarrass a groom who wouldn’t be able to recite them himself.
  2. Maharil (Hilchos Nisuin) would face the bride and groom specifically for the blessing of “Sameach Tisamach,” and common practice is to do so for all of the brachos (see Shulchan Ha’Ezer 2:42). The Aruch Hashulchan (62:9) writes that ideally, the bride and groom should face East, and the person reciting the brachos should face West.
  3. Mordechai Kesuvos 131, Shut Maharsham 1:160, Sdei Chemed “Chasan V’Kallah” 18, all quoted in Otzar Haposkim 62:1:10.
  4. Shaarei Efraim on Hilchos Keriyas haTorah Shaar 9 Pischei Shearim 19, Shut Har Tzvi O.C. 44, cf. Pischei Teshuvos 61:17 that one person recites all of the blessings appears to be implied strongly by all of the Rishonim who discuss these brachos, especially considering that the brachos are considered smuchim to each other.
  5. See Igros Moseh E.H. 1:94, Tzitz Eliezer 6:2:5, Yabia Omer 4:7, and Mishneh Halachos 4:204 who all defend this practice, although none of these poskim appear to be so encouraging of the custom. Rav Moshe Feinstein notes that all those reciting the brachos should still make sure to listen and say amen to all of the others. See Otzar Haposkim 62:3:4 and Shut Bnei Banim 4:6 for further discussion of splitting the brachos generally as well as grouping various brachos together, such as the first two or the first six.
  6. Be’er Heitiv 62:3 quoting Rambam in Shut Pe’er Hador 9. Nitei Gavriel Nisuin 34:3 applies this to the bracha of “Hagafen” as well. Similarly, if there is no one who knows all of the brachos, they may still recite whatever brachos they know (Otzar Haposkim 62:3:1).
  7. Erech Lechem Siman 61, see Mishnah Brurah 128:51
  8. Hanisuin K'Hilchatan pg. 512
  9. Yalkut Yosef (Chupah VeKiddushin pg 301) rules that in order to make all 7 Brachot of Sheva Brachot one needs to fulfill three conditions: 1) it takes place in the house of groom, 2)there’s ten men there, and 3) there’s two new faces. On pg 307 he writes that when making a meal not in the house of the groom the one doing Zimmun makes Hagefen, and asher bara and then drink from the wine. He should also have the bride and groom and groom in mind and the bride and groom should have in mind to fulfill his obligation when making the Brachot and have them taste the wine afterwards. Siddur Kol Eliyahu (pg 916) which is based on the rulings of Rav Mordechai Eliyahu writes that the proper minhag is only to make the 7 Brachot when one is having the meal in the house of the bride and groom. However, some are lenient to have the 7 Brachot said by Ashkenazim who rely on those who say to make the Brachot. Rabbi Mansour on Daily Halacha quotes Chacham Baruch, Chacham Ovadyah Yosef, and Chacham Ezra Attiyah who agree that one can only two Brachot and not all sheva Brachot when it’s not taking place in the house of the groom. See Otzar haPoskim, Sh"t Vayashav HaYam vol. 2, Shemesh uMagen, Ohr LeTzion vol. 2, and Birkat Hashem vol.4 for different opinions.
  10. The Gemara 7b-8a says that Birkat Chatanim needs a Minyan, based either on Boaz or a the Pasuk in Tehillim, "BaMakhelot Barechut et Hashem." The Rishonim (see Kiddushin), debate whether or not this extends to Birkat Erusin as well or not, but they all agree that Birkat Chatanim does require a Minyan.
    If there aren't even ten men in the whole town, the Rashba (Shut 1:1167, Meyuchasot 185) holds that one absolutely needs ten people, as the Chachamim prohibited one to his wife for whom he did not make Sheva Berachot. On the other hand, the Terumat HaDeshen (140), quotes a Teshovot Maimoni who explains Chazal's terminology of "Kallah BeLo Beracha" to be more colloquial than literal, in reference to the Chuppah itself. The Beit Yosef (64:4) paskens like the Terumat HaDeshen, while the Rama, Chelkat Mechokek 3, and Beit Shmuel 4, pasken like the Terumat HaDeshen that one only needs a Minyan lechatechilah.
  11. Aruch Hashulchan 62:11, explaining that the minyan is truly necessary only out of respect for the earlier bracha of “Shehakol Bara” and those referring to Yerushalayim. However, at least three men are needed in order to have a zimun for Birkas HaMazon
  12. Shulchan Aruch EH 62:4, see Yabia Omer vol. 3 EH Siman 11
  13. Yabia Omer EH 3:11:6
  14. Gemara Ketubot 7b. See Panim Chadashot New Faces on chabad.org.
  15. Nitei Gavriel Hilchot Nisuin 2:87:1
  16. Nitai Gavriel (Nesuin vol. 2, 86:3)
  17. Nitei Gavriel Nissuin 87:3
  18. Nitei Gavriel Nissuin 87:4
  19. The Chelkat Mechokek EH 62:9 writes that you only need one new person for panim chadashot. This is also the opinion of the Aruch Hashulchan 62:24. Yabia Omer EH 3:11:2 is strict for the Rav Avraham Ben HaRambam (teshuva 86 and 110) in explaining the Rambam that two people are necessary.
  20. Maseches Sofrim 19:11 implies otherwise, but the Tur and Shulchan Aruch 62:5 indicate that only after a meal should Sheva Brachos be recited, and this is the ruling of the Aruch Hashulchan 62:26. See Yabia Omer 3:11:6 and Sefer Hanisuin K'Hilchatan p. 512 who write even Mezonos would be insufficient.
  21. Shut Shoel U’Meishiv Telisa’ah 1:198, Yabia Omer EH 3:11:6
  22. See Pischei Teshuva 62:8, Nitai Gavriel, Nesuin 102:2, Yabia Omer EH 3:11:6, and Otzar Haposkim 62:25:5
  23. Yabia Omer 6:10:9, Tzitz Eliezer 13:99:4, Otzar Haposkim 62:25:6
  24. Ketubot 7a, Shulchan Aruch Even HaEzer 62:6
  25. Pirkei DRabbi Eliezer 16