Kiddushin: Difference between revisions
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# If a non-married woman had relations with a cohen outside of marriage and he admits that it is his son, the child is a cohen.<Ref>Rama 3:9. Chelkat Mechokek 3:13 adds that the father admits that he was with her and the mother doesn’t say that she was with other people. Pitchei Teshuva 3:11 quotes Bet Shmuel 4:40 that we should be concerned that she had relations with non-cohanim and establishes this Rama to be where there was no cohanim in the vicinity. However, Knesset Yechezkel answers justifies Rama even when there are yisraelim around. Otzar Haposkim 3:56 quotes Peni Moshe who answers that this case wasn’t discussing a woman who admitted that she had relations with a mamzer, but a woman who one time had relations with a cohen outside marriage. There isn’t a concern that she also had relations with someone else.</ref> If the father wouldn’t be there and just the mother would say that the child is a cohen she wouldn’t be trusted, though the child can be assumed not to be a mamzer.<Ref>Chelkat Mechokek 3:13. See Otzar Haposkim 3:50 about a dispute in the rishonim if the mother is trusted to say her child is a cohen if she is certain.</ref> | # If a non-married woman had relations with a cohen outside of marriage and he admits that it is his son, the child is a cohen.<Ref>Rama 3:9. Chelkat Mechokek 3:13 adds that the father admits that he was with her and the mother doesn’t say that she was with other people. Pitchei Teshuva 3:11 quotes Bet Shmuel 4:40 that we should be concerned that she had relations with non-cohanim and establishes this Rama to be where there was no cohanim in the vicinity. However, Knesset Yechezkel answers justifies Rama even when there are yisraelim around. Otzar Haposkim 3:56 quotes Peni Moshe who answers that this case wasn’t discussing a woman who admitted that she had relations with a mamzer, but a woman who one time had relations with a cohen outside marriage. There isn’t a concern that she also had relations with someone else.</ref> If the father wouldn’t be there and just the mother would say that the child is a cohen she wouldn’t be trusted, though the child can be assumed not to be a mamzer.<Ref>Chelkat Mechokek 3:13. See Otzar Haposkim 3:50 about a dispute in the rishonim if the mother is trusted to say her child is a cohen if she is certain.</ref> | ||
==Mechutanim With Same Names== | ==Advice of Rabbi Yehuda Hachasid== | ||
#Rabbi Yehuda Hachasid advised that people with the same name shouldn’t marry off their children to each other. Some are not concerned with this at all.<ref>Otzar Haposkim 2 | ===Mechutanim With Same Names=== | ||
#If one of the parents has a double name and the other doesn’t, many hold that it is permitted. For example, if one’s name is Yehuda and the other is Yehuda Leib, there is no concern.<ref>Otzar Haposkim 2 | #Rabbi Yehuda Hachasid advised that people with the same name shouldn’t marry off their children to each other. Some are not concerned with this at all.<ref>Otzar Haposkim (siman 2, Tzvat R' Yehuda Hachasid n. 19) quotes Avnei Tzedek who is lenient since some editions of Rav Yehuda Hachasid don’t say this prohibition at all and even those who do it isn’t clear if it was just for his descendants or all Jews. Another reason he is lenient is that the prohibition is only when the parents arrange the marriage but not if the children decide to marry.</ref> Even those who are have certain leniencies: | ||
# If one of the parents goes by another name even though their Hebrew names are the same, some say that there is no concern.<ref>Otzar Haposkim 2 | #If one of the parents has a double name and the other doesn’t, many hold that it is permitted. For example, if one’s name is Yehuda and the other is Yehuda Leib, there is no concern.<ref>Otzar Haposkim (siman 2, Tzvat R' Yehuda Hachasid n. 19) quoting Mekor Chesed, Tzemech Tzedek, and Sdei Chemed</ref> | ||
# The concern doesn’t apply to a step-father of one of the sides, only biological parents.<ref>Otzar Haposkim 2 | # If one of the parents goes by another name even though their Hebrew names are the same, some say that there is no concern.<ref>Otzar Haposkim (siman 2, Tzvat R' Yehuda Hachasid n. 19) quoting Heshiv Moshe</ref> | ||
# The concern doesn’t apply to a step-father of one of the sides, only biological parents.<ref>Otzar Haposkim (siman 2, Tzvat R' Yehuda Hachasid n. 19) quoting China Vchisda</ref> | |||
# Many poskim hold that there is no concern if the two mother-in-laws have the same name. It is only a concern for two father-in-laws with the same name.<ref>Otzar Haposkim 2:19 quoting Avnei Tzedek, Rav Chaim Palagi, and Shulchan Haezer as lenient. Sdei Chemed argues that it is based on ayin hara and applies equally to women. </ref> | # Many poskim hold that there is no concern if the two mother-in-laws have the same name. It is only a concern for two father-in-laws with the same name.<ref>Otzar Haposkim 2:19 quoting Avnei Tzedek, Rav Chaim Palagi, and Shulchan Haezer as lenient. Sdei Chemed argues that it is based on ayin hara and applies equally to women. </ref> | ||
===Daughter-in-Law Same Name As Mother-in-Law or Son-in-Law Like Father-in-Law=== | |||
#Rabbi Yehuda Hachasid advised that a woman not marry a man whose mother's name is like her name. Similarly, a man should not marry a woman whose father's name is like his name.<ref>Pitchei Teshuva 2:7</ref> Some are only concerned for a wife and mother-in-law having the same name and not concerned for a man and a father-in-law having the same name.<Ref>Otzar Haposkim (siman 2, Tzvat R' Yehuda Hachasid n. 20) quoting Arizal and Divrei Chayim</ref> Reasons suggested for this are ayin hara,<ref>Otzar Haposkim (siman 2, Tzvat R' Yehuda Hachasid n. 3) quoting Chida on Sefer Hachasidim n. 477</ref> in order to be able to fulfill kibbud av v'em by naming one's child after one's parent after they pass away,<ref>Otzar Haposkim (siman 2, Tzvat R' Yehuda Hachasid n. 3) quoting Maharil 17</ref> or so that the wife doesn't call her husband by his first name in front of her father sharing that same name.<ref>Otzar Haposkim (siman 2, Tzvat R' Yehuda Hachasid n. 3) quoting Even Harosha. In n. 4 Tirosh Vyitzhar is quoted as holding that if he doesn't call his wife by her name and instead by rebbetzin it is fine even if her name is like his mother's name.</ref> | |||
#It is permitted for one of them to change their name to avoid this issue.<ref>Pitchei Teshuva 2:7 quotes that the Chatom Sofer switched someone's name to avoid this issue.</ref> | |||
#There are many leniencies: | |||
##If they go by different names even if their real names are the same is fine.<ref>Otzar Haposkim (siman 2, Tzvat R' Yehuda Hachasid n. 1) quoting Sheilat Shalom, Maharsham, Makor Chesed, and Zichron Yehuda.</ref> | |||
## It is worthwhile to marry into a Torah family and not be concerned with the names being the same.<ref>Pitchei Teshuva 2:7 quoting Chatom Sofer is lenient in order to marry into a Torah family as long as the names of the son, father, and grandfather aren't the same as his spouse's father and grandfather.</ref> | |||
==Sources== | ==Sources== | ||
